From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Wed Jun 2, 2004 11:39:30 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Left-leaning Liberal platform pushes peace initiatives, day care, new energy
Dear Paul,
Sorry I didn’t write yesterday. I blame it on the rain. I cycled to and from work in heavy, heavy rain, then later on to Claudine’s to watch a movie (Acid House–pas mal, mais pas bon ni). Luckily I have waterproof pants and jacket, though by the third trip my shoes were soaked and full of water and I took to wearing my flip-flops.
The painting at work is going well, though I am feeling in a bit of a rut lately artistically. I need to make time to make work, it’s as simple as that. Today was actually a bit of a wonky day at work; the electricians were back after a two-week absence, and of course ended up cutting more holes in walls and ceilings that had already been painted. Back to square one. On the way home Courtney and I cycled over the mountain, as I needed to stop by the Provigo on Monkland, where I had left my wallet earlier in the day on a coffee and bottled water run. I have ripped the back pocket out of my work jeans, as it had a huge hole in it and I was losing tools. I habitually put my wallet in that pocket, and probably tried to put it there, sans pocket, after paying for the water. The bike ride over the mountain was fun. A bit of a warmup for the Tour d’Isle Claudine and I are taking part in on Sunday.
Had supper at Claudine’s tonight; she was a bit upset after speaking to her landlord, who is trying to raise her rent, putting her in an unpleasant situation. Hung out briefly with Mohanad and Rebecca later on; Rebecca is passing through on her way to NYC for her Museum of Modern Art internship.
I’m going to try to get back into the habit of reading more at night; am working on Life of Pi, but Claudine recently lent me Paul Auster’s Oracle Nights, so I think I’ll carry on with that. I like his writing, and feel very close to it somehow; there is something in the way he ponders the passage of time I find compelling.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Thu Jun 3, 2004 9:42:02 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Woman whose babies died while she partied with boyfriend denied parole
Dear Paul,
I don’t have much time; Courtney tripped on the computer power cord and broke it, so I am on battery power, and down to 55%. So I’ll have to make this short and sweet and snappy. Sort of like how I paint.
Mohanad and I met with a guy named Bill today, who will hopefully hire us on future projects. He stopped by the house in Cote-St-Luc to check out our progress. Now that the bamboo flooring is almost completed, and I have finished the kitchen and front entryway, the place is really starting to come together.
My big plans tonight were to start a couple new paintings and do my french homework. So far I have accomplished neither, but I have been making headway on Oracle Nights. Like most of his novels, this one is really sucking me in. I think I’d like to go to New york and stalk Paul Auster, or at least try to meet him. I should have tried to meet him when he was in town for the Blue Met literary festival.
Anyway, I should go and try to get some work done before I’m too exhausted. Today I’m worn out from more than just working and cycling; Laurent stopped by the job site and lent Mohanad and I his football. We then took some time out of the afternoon to go to the park next door and throw and kick the old pigskin around. Now my back and joints are feeling it. We may act like we are nineteen (sometimes at work we regress to twelve or eight year olds), but our bodies are aging rapidly. The steady diet of cigarettes and coffee is probably not helping the situation, but what can you do?
The other night Claudine and I started a conversation about boredom. Not so much the everyday boredom one often encounters, but a deeper, more profound sense of fatigue. The sort of feeling one gets when life becomes too predictable, mundane, repetitive. It could be because I have no really exciting projects on the go; the Brown Suitcase has been mute for some time, my frottage projects are stalled, and the PM portrait gallery is just too comprehensive a project to undertake part-time. Learning a language is a hefty project, and my heart is in it, but I often feel my efforts are thwarted by working too much in anglo areas, by not practicing, by procrastinating. I know it will take a long time, and I learn bit by bit, but still not enough to feel comfortable putting my thoughts into another stream of thinking. And damn my sieve-like memory! Whenever I do try the simplest words or phrases disappear on me, and I’m left sputtering and gasping like a fish out of water.
Anyway, I’m down to 46% and I still have to research for the Nuits Blanche, Tableaux Noir visual arts festival that is happening on Mont Royal next week. I think I’d like to participate.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Fri Jun 4, 2004 8:39:33 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Conservatives would spend billions more on health care, Harper says
Dear Paul,
Another week down. How many more to go? The three of us played more football in the field behind the house during lunch. It was nice to be outside in the sun; the rest of the day I was holed up painting in a staircase and in the basement. Nice and cool, but I would have rather been in the sun.
On the way home Courtney and I stopped at Senzala’s for supper, and we shared a pitcher of beer. I positioned myself in direct sunlight, and enjoyed the wide expanse of clear blue sky overhead. We smoked Peter Jacksons and talked about signing up for a stay in a pharmaceutical clinic for cash. I find it a slightly scary proposition, and worry about side effects, such as impotence. On the other hand, as we were discussing with Sarah and Melissa later in the evening (I stopped by their house to retrieve my fully-charged computer—I had used Sarah’s adaptor to charge the battery), it could be a fun opportunity to write a book; perhaps even an exposé on the whole trend of “hiring” volunteer guinea pigs for whatever drugs they want to be peddling. Certainly worth further investigation.
Kuan, the little bugger, woke me up at 5:30 this morning with her incessant meowing and purring. I think I should maybe start letting her outside at that hour, and give myself more sleep. Was having weird dreams anyway.
I just finished Oracle Night and I have to admit I feel unsatisfied. I could have read longer; I wanted more, I didn’t want it to end. I don’t like what happened to Grace; or John; or even M.R. Chang. I want to know more about the fictional (that is, fictional within the story—the characters within the stories within stories). I should read it again, but it is a loaner, and I have french homework to attend to. I’m going to see Plastikman tonight—the first live set in 9 years, and so far as I know, the one and only North American show. Could be interesting. Right now, I seem to be particularly interested in things that have a clearly defined date of happening, if that makes any sense.
I’m off to smoke a cigarette and have a shower; I really need one (a shower, that is). My hair is standing straight up on its own. Courtney says I should go out like this, as a sort of deranged Corey Hart wannabe. I don’t want to be.
-chris
PS. I didn’t get the articule job. Maybe it’s for the best? I’m not really sure if I’m ready to jump back into arts admin.
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Tue Jun 8, 2004 12:14:42 AM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Harper detours to Quebec, says Liberal attack ad could help his party
Dear Paul,
Well, the “donkey hours” are about to begin at the Cote St-Luc job. The designer was in and was being really picky about the painting; edges, corners, doorframes, the whole nine yards basically. We’re supposed to be finished by Thursday, when the carpets get installed, but there is still a pile of work ahead of us. Lots of touchups. It’s annoying because the house is basically a piece of crap; shitty construction through and through. And they want it to look like a million bucks. Trouble is, we’re not making a million bucks (far from it!), and the costs are fixed. We’re a little worried the owner may hold onto the final installment if he’s not completely satisfied, leaving us high and dry. We may be camping out there for the next few days to try to finish up.
Man, sometimes I really hate the rich.
So I didn’t hear back from you (no surprise there!), so here’s a quick recap of the weekend:
* the Friday night Plastikman show was a bit monotonous and only terribly exciting for the diehard electronika fans (who whooped and cheered at every beep and whistle). I became far more interested with how he managed to touch his hair (brushing the new skater bangs away from his eyes in between playing with all the controls and dials).
* Almost didn’t go to french class; the desire to sleep in was so strong! But I managed to pull myself out of bed, finish my devoirs and got to class only fifteen minutes late.
* Biked to the Oratoire St. Joseph and bought a snazzy hologram (Jesus to the Shroud of Turin) that was 50% off.
* Made supper for Courtney, Sarah Fork and Melissa, then met Claudine after she finished work. We stopped at Zinc for a drink before retiring for the night (we were both exhausted)
* Up early Sunday for the Tour d’Isle. We arrived late and still had to wait in line for close to an hour before actually starting. I have never seen so many cyclists in one place at one time. It was a fun ride; 45 kilometres isn’t really that much. It was amazing to see the community spirit; there were people out on their porches with balloons and music, people clapping and cheering the cyclists on (like it was the Tour de France!), and musicians at almost every viaduct.
* Went shopping along St. Denis and cut myself on a knife while at Stokes buying placemats (to check to see if the knives were sharp, d’uh).
* Ate at our favourite Portugese chicken place, Chez Dorval, yum!
* Worked all day, feeling frustrated and angry (the good feelings from a relaxing, enjoyable fun and sun-filled weekend rapidly fading away.
* Cut my own hair tonight; pas mal, mais pas superbe!
* Made a fabulous Greek salad for Sarah R. and Sarah Fork while doing laundry and retrieving my computer
* Watched the Flames lose the Stanley Cup
* Placed bids on AC adaptors for the computer on eBay while sitting on the back terrace (you have to love those twenty-five foot ethernet cables!) The evenings are starting to be nice and balmy.
I’m going to go read for a bit (Still working on Life of Pi and 1967). Tomorrow I’ll tell you more about my tentative plans to register for a stay with one of those pharmaceutical testing companies (they pay well) and write a book about the experience (while experiencing it).
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Tue Jun 8, 2004 9:41:23 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Paul Martin juggles election campaign with prime minister’s job at G8 Summit
Dear Paul,
Sorry, no pharmaceutical story tonight; I’m down to 11%. Our first eBay contact from Hong Kong wrote back, and the charger we were inquiring about isn’t compatible. So the search continues.
The job came to a head today but Mohanad came out on top, so we will continue working and complete everything by Sunday.
The sun came out with a vengeance today, and the air is still hot and humid, even now, close to ten. Courtney and I made fajitas (on the barbeque, where else?), and now we’re walking for ice cream (and dropping off Mr. Computer to SSM for charging.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Wed Jun 9, 2004 10:19:31 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: High-profile Tories back McLellan; Conservatives play up Liberal defection
Dear Paul,
I’m feeling lazy tonight, and don’t much feel like writing. Instead, I found a survey on the Web on the “average guy” that I thought might take your mind of the election, and the G-7, and the D-Day anniversary, and all that jazz. Oh, and regarding the election, today I chose Stephen Harper over you. No, I wasn’t voting in an advance poll, I was wiping my arse with a section from the Globe and Mail because we were out of toilet paper at work.
1. How many days each year does the average guy work out at his gym?
The correct answer is 115
(except in my case, where I haven’t even been to a gym since 1998)
2. Percentage of men who believe a daily walk is all the exercise they would need to stay healthy:
The correct answer is 40
3. Which country is home to the highest percentage of overweight 10-year-old boys?
The correct answer is United States
4. How big is the average guy’s bicep?
The correct answer is 21
(mine are a meagre 13)
5. What percentage of his body weight can the average guy bench?
The correct answer is 93
(I am pleased that I can bench a little more than my own body weight. Speaking of which, I made the call to Algorythm Pharma today, and after holding on the line for just over twenty minutes I spoke with a representative about staying in the clinic for one of the drug trials. It turns out I don’t weigh enough to participate; I’ll have to gain at least seven pounds before I can take part. So now I’m thinking of going on a high protein diet; either that or eating at McDonald’s every day)
6. How many calories does the average guy consume in a day?
The correct answer is 2,618
(I wouldn’t have a clue, I don’t count them. How many does a chocolatine have?)
7. What’s the average guy’s body-mass index (BMI)?
The correct answer is 26.6
(I don’t even know what that is)
8. What is the average guys mostly commonly used piece of home exercise equipment?
The correct answer is Free Weights
(Does a bed count?)
9. How many diets will the average guy try in his lifetime?
The correct answer is 2
(Looks like I’ll soon be at half that number)
10. How many push-ups can the average guy do?
The correct answer is 27
(I can almost double that. Must be from my old army days?)
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Fri Jun 11, 2004 8:18:39 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: CSIS visited Syria in Arar case, received copy of false confession: lawyer
Dear Paul,
Can’t write much; Sarah H. and Tim C. arrived from Toronto, and they and Claudine and I are at my place making supper (barbeque, of course!) and drinking wine and talking art and theory. Later on we’ll hit Mont Royal for le Nuit Blanche sur Tableux Noir: 9e edition. Should be fun.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd5676@hotmail.com>
Date: Sun Jun 13, 2004 8:11:23 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd5676@hotmail.com, chrislloyd@videotron.ca
Subject: Leaders’ debates may provide last chance for parties to get election momentum
Dear Paul,
OK, I’ve decided that I will vote for the Liberal candidate in my riding only if you write me a personal letter. It has to be at least 500 words and can’t be as boring as the blogs you used to post. Otherwise I’m voting for the Bloc.
Well, it’s been a fun weekend, full of sun and crowds and excitement, alcohol, flames, near death experiences, fire, blood, vomit and more.
Today while preparing a snack at Claudine’s I drove my hand through a glass while attempting to catch a falling bowl, and sliced my knuckle open. After the initial blood-letting you could see the tendon moving. Claudine took me to the pharmacy and we bought peroxide and those snappy-looking stiching bandaids. I didn’t want to wait at the hospital for hours on end. And lucky for me she has this magic stain removing detergent that took the blood out of my new short pants.
Other than the bleeding episode we had a really fun and pleasant afternoon; slept in, some morning exersizes, breakfast at a nice Iranian cafe on Laurier, and wandered around the Plateau taking photographs.
Last night we went to the Sixtoo show at Sala Rosa and he (and the other DJs) did not disapoint. I stayed until the end and then some, talking with Elizabeth. She is moving back to NB this week, but I think we figured out a solution to the Canadian Tire project: an audio diary, or journal, where we both make our own casual audio guides and/or descriptions of our visits to various Canadian Tire stores, and send them back and forth to one another. Could become an interesting correspondence project.
After my french class (which went fairly well, considering the fact I was a half hour late–due to drinking too much the night before, at Zinc bar, with Tim and Sarah and Courtney and Claudine–and considering that we started our exams–which I think I did OK on. Not great, but I am certainly improving. I need to keep practicing, but it’s coming, slowly but surely), I met Sarah and we had some lunch and then hit some galleries in the Belgo. Saw some nice paintings by Francois (can’t remember last name at the moment), really luscious, glassy swoops and swirls. Not much else was really that exciting, but I’m still in a mood where I find it diffcult to get jazzed up by art. With the current weather I’d rather be outside, on my bike or on a terrace, soaking up the rays, reading more. I’m soon going to be working on more frottage paintings, and at least with those I can do most of the production outside. Just pile up the paints and rollers and trays and canvasses in the Brown Suitcase and hit the streets.
We all met up at Claudine’s in the early evening and decided to barbeque in Parc LaFontaine, so we packed up the food and supplies and found a nice spot with a picnic table. We tried to light the charcoal briquettes with fondue fuel, but the initial flame didn’t catch and the flame died. I bet you know where this story is headed now, don’t you? So I tried to light the briquettes again using more fuel, and foolishly poured some next to a live flame. WHOOSH! and a huge blue flame billows across the table, knocking Claudine, Caroline and Mary Lou to the ground on their backs in unison. The table, my book-bag and two styrofoam cups were ablaze, but the flames were easily padded out. Luckily no one was hurt, though Caroline got a bit of a burn near her collarbone. The rest of the barbeque was fun, after we all calmed down we drank wine, ate chips, ble d’Inde and salad, and waited for the chicken to cook–which burned on the outside almost immediately but took a long time to cook on the inside.
Anyway, I’m off to meet Elizabeth to further discuss Canadian Tire plans, and then will most likely watch a movie at Claudine’s. Tim and Sarah are out for supper with friends, and are staying at my place, so there isn’t a whole lot of room. I’m working tomorrow but don’t know how efficient I’ll be; I’ve taken to wearing a plastic knife on my finger as a splint, so I don’t split the cut open. Makes cycling difficult, but painting should be easier.
Oh, and I found one of the paintings I’d been trying to hunt down that the AGNS bought; it was on top of one of my shelves. I’d forgotten that Aaron had packed it for me. I need to change the text; currently it is in rub-on letters, and should be painted in the newspaper font. I’ll do that this week, after my finger heals.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Tue Jun 15, 2004 11:29:08 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Election campaign remains a toss-up after leaders debate
Dear Paul,
Sorry I didn’t write yesterday. But I’m sticking to what I told you last: I’ll vote Liberal only if you write me back, 500 words or more. If I hear nothing before the 28th I’m voting Bloc (or NDP…OK, I haven’t totally made up my mind). I watched a bit of the debate tonight with Elizabeth, who had come over for supper (barbeque, of course). We had a good laugh at all the catch phrases and spin and arguing and shouting over one another. This is called debate? Five minutes per major topic? I recorded the debate, so I can watch the whole thing later. Claudine’s dad recorded the french version from last night, that we’ll watch later as well. I tried to record it last night before going out, at SSM (they have better TV reception), but neither Courtney nor I could figure out the workings of the VCR.
Tonight I took Mohanad’s keys home with me by accident after work and had to bike back to Cote St. Luc so that the poor guy could leave; he was going stir-crazy. He’s been putting in the donkey hours, trying to wrap up the project. Today I finished the painting touch ups, and tomorrow I’ll go in again to help with some final installations and cleanup.
A bunch of us went out for supper last night at Le Roi de Plateau; Sarah, Tim, Courtney and Brent and Tamara, who were in town briefly on their way to trois-Rivières to take part in a sculpture biennale. They called me Saturday night from the airport; I gave them directions to my place. With four house guests for the weekend I spent all my evenings at Claudine’s place; by day four, I think I had driven her halfway around the bend. Tonight I have my place to myself for the first time ever; Sarah and Tim have gone back to Toronto, and Courtney went to trois-Rivières to help install.
Last night after the restaurant we went to Reservoir, where Jeremy works, and drank beer and smoked cigarettes and talked art and politics. Ran into most of the SSM crew and Tim and Jen (it’s a small city, after all), and then were invited back to a house party by some guy. The party turned out to be nothing but a couple people passed out on a couch and someone playing on a computer; we left before even going inside. Got a bit wet in the sudden rain as we doubled home on Claudine’s bike, but it was fun and refreshing.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Thu Jun 17, 2004 2:59:21 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Harper says taxpayers want Martin to say if Liberals got kickback money
Dear Paul,
Sorry I didn’t write yesterday. But my offer still stands: a personal reply from you before the election and I’ll vote Liberal. If you want my vote, it’s easy: just drop me a line. I know you must be busy post-debate, after being ganged up on by pretty much everyone, but you’ve still got eleven days to recuperate, plan and implement new campaign strategy, travel around, and hug babies—plenty of time to write back.
Last night I went to see The Day After Tomorrow with Elizabeth. It was her last night in Montréal and we felt like experiencing some Hollywood Blockbuster Fluff. The special effects were quite amazing, albeit sort of sickening and horrifying, too; I mean, watching realistic-looking multiple tornados rip apart downtown LA or a tsunami wipe out NYC aren’t really nice things to see. And as one would expect, the script and dialogue sucked ass. Anyway, I got my money’s worth during the previews; some good laughs as a result of Hollywood turning it’s unblinking eye on historical figures such as Alexander the Great and mythic figures such as King Arthur, and I quite enjoyed the preview for the Spider-Man sequel. We went to Else’s after the movie for a drink or two. I stayed out too late and missed the metro. Found a nice (cheesy) velvet painting in the trash. While waiting for a night bus on St. Denis some guy offered me a ride up the street—for five bucks. He said he needed it for gas.
Today has been an apartment day so far; cleaning, organizing, doing some email, eating, drinking coffee, etc. Stopped at a dollar store and finally bought some wine glasses. Time to stock up on all those little things that I keep forgetting about—like salad bowls (mine has a few large cracks in the bottom, making it difficult to hold liquid). Not terribly exciting, but somewhat satisfying. Finally finished the invoice for the AGNS; there is a painting I can’t account for. I don’t know if I sold it already or just lost it somehow. C’est mon vie.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd5676@hotmail.com>
Date: Fri Jun 18, 2004 11:45:41 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd5676@hotmail.com, chrislloyd@videotron.ca
Subject: Conservatives on the defensive after child porn message mars moderate image
Dear Paul,
Sorry I didn’t write yesterday (sheesh, this is becoming a habit! The project is supposed to be every day, not every second day. But oh well, what can you do when your battery keeps dying?). Anyway, I’ve given the “I’ll vote Liberal if you write me back” offer a bit more thought, and now I’m not so sure if I’ll go through with it. Last night we smoked a little bit of pot and were listening to the radio and thought we had stumbled upon a weird pirate radio station that was editing and mixing election coverage, debates and commercials. It sounded odd because there was no discernable DJ, and lots of CBC related plugs. Turns out it was a CBC TV station—only on the radio. But it got me thinking about proportional representation and that, combined with the new fundraising rules, makes me really hesitate about potentially throwing my vote to the dogs (Liberals). So I need a sweeter pot: IF you write me back (500 words minimum, remember) and IF you promise (Ha! promises, promises!) to do something about the outrageous student loan situation in this country (like forgive loans based on post-study incomes—and I don’t mean “interest relief”). I’ve been on interest relief for 4 years, and have yet to breach the income level that would allow me to A. pay back my loan and B. live (i.e. eat, pay rent, etc.). So if those conditions are met, I’ll vote Liberal. Maybe.
Anyway, I was back in Cote St-Luc today for some final touchups. Almost lost my mind trying to re-install the screens. But the house looks good and the owner seems really happy. Mohanad gave me his digital camera as a bonus for doing such a good job.
Courtney is back, and the other three are coming over to spend the night (and the next few nights), so I am at SSM. I have to help Sarah Fork dye her hair as a toll for letting me crash, so I’ve got to run. She’s getting impatient.
Oh, I finished the first of the Street Painting series tonight (well, the first stage, anyhow). It looks good. I’m sending some work to Peter in SJ for August. I’ll post an image on my ZED account in the next day or so. Let me know what you think.
OK, she’s driving me up the #$*!!**! wall.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Mon Jun 21, 2004 1:21:12 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Open health meeting up to put premiers’ “feet to the fire” on reform: Martin
Dear Paul,
Happy belated Father’s Day. I’m feeling like a bad son; I didn’t reach my dad by phone yesterday (though I did call him today at work). My folks weren’t home when I called, and then before I knew it, it was too late to call again. After a late start the Drawing Club took over the evening. I’m sure it will take a few weeks for it to find its groove, but there was a good turnout—the four weary travelers plus Sarah Fork, Jen and Tim. I wasn’t entirely into it, and spent most of the evening in the kitchen making salad and on the terrace monitoring the barbeque. I made a few half-hearted attempts at some doodles but my heart wasn’t into it.
I’d spent a highly relaxing, lazy Sunday afternoon with Claudine at her place. We heard what sounded like a parade and then watched the Olympic Flame as it passed by on Mont Royal. A nice little parade, short and sweet, marred only by obscene sponsorship flags. What sort of memento of an Olympic Torch worldwide relay is a Coca-Cola or Samsung flag? Anyway, I’d arrived at Claudine’s early in the morning, after attending a party at Mohanad’s friend Liz’s place Saturday night. I swear, that’ll be the last time I show up at a party where I don’t know anyone, immediately after smoking a joint. For me, it makes introductory conversations in English difficult, while at the same time enhancing how poor my conversational french is. I really hope the intensive class helps. Aside from the language inadequacies, I had a good time, as it was a nice party in a really nice apartment and I met some nice people. And the lazy Sunday afternoon really hit the spot!
Last night, after Drawing Club, I went to SSM (no room at my Inn, what with the weary travelers taking up both rooms). The tension is mounting at SSM, as Sarah Fork is planning to move out, but doesn’t have a place yet, and Melissa has given her a date, and Sarah Roberts recently broke up with Mark. I don’t like tension, but what can you do?
Now it’s time for me to get motivated. I have an undetermined amount of time off from day-job type work, in order to produce a ton or more of art. Just have to try to not get too distracted by a Montréal where summer is starting to hit its stride. You know how well I can procrastinate. I have to change a tire on my bike; I rode through some glass and got a flat. That right there gives me an excuse to sit outside all afternoon tinkering.
Have to stay focused and gear up for the potential transfer of power, and subsequent change of addressee. It feels as if I haven’t had much time to adjust to writing to you, and suddenly it seems possible that soon I might be writing to—shudder—Stephen Harper. The Conservatives have wacky (and dangerous) views on everything from the Military to the Arts, in between messing with the Charter, Health, Privatization, Bilingualism, Crime, the Law, Equal Rights and more. A saving grace would be if it is only a minority PC government, with a healthy dose of opposition to blunt their wacky right-wing agenda. I wonder if he would ever write me back?
Still haven’t heard from you; I guess my vote isn’t worth the effort for you? I have read that your “handlers” are working you into the ground, but a single letter doesn’t take too long. Heck, sometimes I write mine in ten or fifteen minutes!
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd5676@hotmail.com>
Date: Tue Jun 22, 2004 11:52:42 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd5676@hotmail.com, chrislloyd@videotron.ca
Subject: Harper relieved at Klein’s move to open health care chest
Dear Paul,
I still haven’t heard back from you. I guess you feel you don’t need my vote? Do you feel too much like I might be bribing you? You’ve got just under a week to write me back, otherwise I’m voting for the Bloc or NDP.
Had a good couple days. Worked on paintings yesterday afternoon and-gasp!-all day today. I’m making good progress. Should have all the paintings and Big Red Book shipped off to the AGNS by Friday, providing I don’t party too hard on Thursday. Hey, what are your plans for St-Jean de Baptiste? Do you usually get loaded? I’ve been told not to wear red.
Last night I met Claudine after she finished work and we went to Reservoir for a quick little impromptu Halifax/NSCAD reunion. Talked with Robbie and Kim a bit, which was nice. Afterwards we cycled down to St. Elizabeth to meet Melissa and Jen and Nick and Mohanad and Sarah R. Sarah, Mohanad and Jen had already left, but we stayed and talked with Melissa and Geoff and his friend. That bar is great, there are tall walls enclosing a terrace in the back that are covered in vines. I had to suppress my Spidey-sense that was telling me to climb, climb, climb. Hey, almost 1 week to the release of Spider-Man 2. I’m planning to go. I even bought Spider-man cereal recently. It has “Spidey-berry” flavour, how could I resist?
After we left St. Elizabeth’s we passed a couple that were helping a man who had fallen on the sidewalk. He was disoriented and needed his medication, or had taken the wrong medication, or was high, or something. I couldn’t quite grasp what was being said. Learning a language seems to be a slippery experience, constantly sliding back and forth between comprehension and incomprehension. Everytime I feel I’ve taken a couple steps forward I find myself in the midst of rapid-fire conversations and I lose it all, and feel like an idiot. But I recently bought a decent dictionary and now that my apartment has been freed up–the merry travelers are on the road again, Brent and Tamara back to NS and Courtney and Sarah are visiting NYC–I plan to study more.
Anyway, I’d best be going. I’m at SSM (battery is almost dead, and Sarah Fork left her computer at school, so I’m using Melissa’s. I can hardly wait for that AC adaptor to arrive from Texas). I’m torn between going home and either a.) smoking a joint and watching the Beatles Yellow Submarine or b.) smoking a joint and watching the campaign leaders debate that I recorded last week. It’s hard to guess which would be more fantastical and entertaining.
Oh, and here’s a great link about the upcoming and inevitable capture of Osama Bin Laden–coming just in time for the 2004 US presidential election. If you end up on the opposition bench after next week, you should keep your eye on Stephen and his buddy-buddy attitude with Bush Jr.
http://www.bushflash.com/lotto.html
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd6627@yahoo.ca>
Date: Fri Jun 25, 2004 1:39:24 PM America/Montreal
To: paul martin <pm@pm.gc.ca>
Cc: chrislloyd@videotron.ca
Subject: Layton gets Ralph Nader endorsement he begins Ontario tour
Dear Paul,
Did you enjoy the Fete yesterday? Hey, I noticed that you’ve changed tactics as we enter the final few days of the campaign; now, instead of “a vote for the Bloc is a vote for the Conservatives” it’s “a vote for the Bloc is a vote for Sovereignty, or the the very least, another referendum”. Well, d’uh. The Bloc haven’t hid the fact that they have a separatist agenda, they have simply maintained that the election is about how Quebec’s interests are served at the federal dining table. But I sense now you must be getting desperate, and feeling the electoral heat. Any word from Jean? Maybe you should ask him for advice! And remember, if you want a Liberal vote here in Petite-Patrie, just jot me a line (500+ words, must be somewhat interesting). It would be nice to hear from you at least once while you are still PM.
So yesterday I alternated between working on a painting and reading in the sun. I finished Fear and Loathing…and subsequently developed an incredible desire to get baked out of my tree and wander around the Mile End to check out the celebrations. Met up with Mohanad on St. Joseph and we sat on the grass (and smoked some) and watched the cars dragging up and down the boulevard honking horns and waving flags;
Portugal had won the Euro Cup. I added to the din with my bicycle horn. We wandered to Café Esperanza where we had some beer and met Liz before heading to another café on Parc to hear Mohanad’s friend Camille play in an improv african jazz ensemble. Fun stuff.
Headed off on my bicycle to Parc Maissoneuve to check out the Spectacles, but by the time I arrived it was winding down. I walked past the Stade to the parc anyhow, walking into oncoming pedestrians, four lanes thick of blue and white. Lots of singing, flags waving. Lots of debris left behind. Claudine called me and I crashed at her place for the night; good thing, I was caught in another Montréal shower on my way home.
More painting today, and then off to the SAT to catch the final night there of the Mutek festival. It’s free, which is a good thing because I am officially broke. The CC letter hasn’t even arrived at the AGNS yet so they can’t issue the cheque yet. Gotta love the bureaucracy, the hurdles, the hoops.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:39:20 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Subject: Harper assails Martin as ‘chameleon,’ faces hostile crowd of protesters
Dear Paul,
Hey, I just got your letter in my new Yahoo! account! Yahoo! Well, I appreciate the letter, but not really the effort. For one thing, it isn’t 500 words long—even if you combine and count both languages. And you also lose points on creativity; this letter sounds just like six I received from your predecessor’s handlers. Since my demands were not met in full, I have no choice but to not vote Liberal. Unless you write a decent letter to me before Monday, 500 word-minimum. And must be “interesting”.
Anyway, I’m in the middle of some painting (and some procrastinating, some reading, arranging, cleaning, eating—quaint little apartment things), but I just wanted to let you know that I received the letter, and I’ll write back later this evening (I am borrowing Sarah Fork’s adaptor for the night, so I’ll be able to catch up on the Internet, yay!).
Here’s a copy of your “reply”; try to be a little more relaxed in the next one. Just be yourself!
-chris
This message is not flagged. [ Flag Message – Mark as Unread ]
Date:Fri, 25 Jun 2004 15:05:42 -0400
From: “Prime Minister/Premier ministre” <pm@pm.gc.ca> View Contact Details
To: chrislloyd6627@yahoo.ca
Subject: RE: Layton gets Ralph Nader endorsement he begins Ontario tour
Please know that your e-mail message has been received in the Prime Minister’s Office and that your comments have been noted. Our office always welcomes hearing from Canadians and being made aware of their views.
Thank you for writing.
Sachez que le Cabinet du Premier ministre a bien reçu votre courriel et que nous avons pris bonne note de vos commentaires. Nous aimons être bien informés de l’opinion des Canadiens et des Canadiennes.
Je vous remercie d’avoir écrit au Premier ministre.
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Wed Dec 31, 1969 10:13:02 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd6627@yahoo.ca
Subject: Harper assails Martin as ‘chameleon,’ faces hostile crowd of protesters
Dear Paul,
Thanks for the letter, though you missed the boat on a couple things. First, the letter isn’t 500 words, even counting both languages. Second, it’s the same damn letter I received six times from your predecessor’s handlers. Couldn’t you be any more creative? Obviously I might have tripped the standard auto reply by sending email to you from my new Yahoo! account. So if you want me to vote Liberal, you’d best send me another letter, one that is somewhat interesting and also meets my condition of 500 words minimum. I’ve pasted a copy of your reply down below.
Went to the last live VJ/DJ mixing night of the summer as part of the MUTEK festival. It was held at the SAT, Société des arts technologiques, down on St. Laurent, near René-Lévesque. I went with Mohanad, and we met Liz and some of her friends and roommates there. The SAT has a great space and tons of gear; the set-up was very slick. For me the inital wonderment wears off, as the video and music just seems to go on and on, mixing and re-mixing, at the same level, for the whole night. There was also a display of graphic design work by some outfit called Lipstick, that sort of resembled a cross between deranged burlesque dancers, S&M porn, and art school. Talked with Marie, a friend of Liz’s, for quite a while; we both got bored of the show and had hot-dogs at a dodgy pool-hall across the street, talking about cats and mathmatics and medicine. Caught a night bus home, and stayed up late trying to psychoanalyze Kuan. She was entering her fifth day in the bathroom (though at some point this morning she moved to my closet). As near as I can tell, there is some unusual hostility between her and Yaga. Now that she has had her taste of freedom (outside), she probably figures she doesn’t need to tolerate his presence anymore. So why then does she not go outside when I have the door open? I had forgotten to buy them cat food, so fed them some tuna instead, which they ravenously devoured, of course. Back to the kibble today, they are.
Slept in late; after talking with the cats I read more of Life of Pi and finally got to the ship sinking and the writing has taken on a whole new feeling. Worked on some paintings today, and finished two. One more to go, hopefully will be finished by Monday in order to send the whole lot to the AGNS. Then I can really get to work on the sidewalk paintings.
I’m staying in tonight, watching Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Try to get this bizarre Hunter S. Thompson kick out of my system.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Mon Jun 28, 2004 12:01:26 AM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd6627@yahoo.ca
Subject: Harper basks in Alberta as campaign challengers criss-cross country
Dear Paul,
You’ve got less than one day to go; if I don’t hear from you tomorrow before I go to the poll then I’m NOT voting Liberal. Hey, has the reason that you’ve not written been because you already know that I won’t vote Liberal? Don’t you trust me? Does my word mean nothing to you? I guess I have bent the truth from time to time in my letters to you, but it’s all been in good fun. Good, clean fun. Just like in politics, eh?
I slept late this morning; a combination of the pot, the sambuca, the Pringles and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Appreciated the movie more the second time around, and after reading the book. I think I’m ready for Breakfast with Hunter now. Oh, and the soft-core porn on TVQ after midnight—Bleu Nuits—kept me up as well.
Sarah Fork called and woke me up; she wanted help moving parts of her bed. Mohanad helped her move out of SSM yesterday. It’s tough being caught in the middle of tense apartment break-ups. I tied the plywood from her bed to my velo avec Bungee Cords. I have almost total faith that bungee cords can do anything. I helped Sarah’s new roommate push a washing machine off their roof. It made a loud crash when it hit the alley and the lid flew halfway across the street. It was certainly the easiest way of removing the broken appliance, if not the most subtle.
Later in the afternoon I strapped the Brown Suitcase/Valise Brun to my bike and sailed around the city, looking for interesting patterns in the sidewalk. Was caught twice in typical, sudden Montréal Downpours. The first was with Mohanad while we were walking to Laurier in search of fine coffee. We were drenched to the skin in a matter of minutes. Oddly enough, we both dried out fairly quickly. We had coffee at Café les entriens. I’ve started leaving my graphite frottages in public washrooms. I’m going to start mapping them; the distance between where they are created to where they are deposited.
The second time I was caught in the rain it was with Claudine. We took shelter at a bus stop on Sherbrooke and smoked a cigarette. We started biking to the Port Vieux after the sun broke again, but then headed east, and ended up by Le Stade. Took some digital photos in an odd No Man’s Land in the middle of Mont Royal; new development, very Banlieue, very alienating. Ran out of battery power. Need to get rechargeables.
Had supper at La Belle Province. I’m hoping the poutine will help add on the necessary pounds for Algorhythm. I’ll have to lie about the pot, but it’s harder to lie about your weight. Especially when they weigh you right off the bat. Unless you eat iron shavings and bits of steel on a daily basis. Spent the evening at Sarah R’s, talking about her relationships. Somehow listening to other people’s relationships always makes me feel better and less anxious and less concerned about my own. As an aside, what do the words “Ralph Gross Rickets” conjure up for you? Something unpleasant? Would you take it as some sort of sign?
Anyway, I had another supper with Sarah and came home with a swollen gut. I hope the extra pounds spread around my whole body, and just don’t end up wrapped around my gut. I guess I should do something like exercise. Am going to paint for awhile. Am slowly becoming more nocturnal.
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Tue Jun 29, 2004 1:19:21 AM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd6627@yahoo.ca
Subject: Liberals win fourth straight mandate, but fail to earn majority
Dear Paul,
Well, I guess some form of congratulations are in order; you’re still the head honcho. Way to go. I decided to watch the entire elections results, from start to finish, but I gave up about twenty minutes ago. Seems the biggest story of the night is just how far off the pollsters were. The whole night was like watching the results of a horse race in slow motion. Very dull, even after smoking. Watched most of it in french, which was mildly more interesting but only because I had to try harder to understand.
I had a mostly quite day. I voted early on. It’s the first time in my personal voting history that a federal candidate I voted for won the riding. For the afternoon I took a long bike ride and worked out some ideas for the frottage drawings. Hung around the house and read a bit. After putting in some time on that second painting I abandoned it for the day and avoided my desk entirely.
Let me know how your celebrations go. After all that whirlwind cross-country campaigning you looked a bit wiped; you should probably take it easy for a while. I’d write more but just watching the results has worn me out (I’m tempted to say it’s sapped me of the will to live but that would be gross hyperbole).
-chris
From: chris lloyd <chrislloyd@videotron.ca>
Date: Tue Jun 29, 2004 10:30:47 PM America/Montreal
To: pm@pm.gc.ca
Cc: chrislloyd6627@yahoo.ca
Subject: Martin says he has won a stable minority government that can work
Dear Paul,
Slept in again. Spent another day avoiding my paintings. I’ve ben thinking about them, but need some distance between them. Since the CC hasn’t sent the AGNS the final letter I’ve lost a part of my motivation. Of course, I should just get the darn things finished and sent away and then I won’t have to think about them anymore and i can concentrate on finding other forms of (paying) work. Cleaned the apartment and then went to Claudine’s and helped her assemble the screen she has been working on the past while. She’s up to her ears in her thesis, and leaves for Baie-St-Paul this weekend, so I thought I’d help out a bit. We had a good talk about the frottage project and different ways it can manifest itself; I’m feeling much better about the work now.
Came back home to let Kuan in—she had been caught outside in the downpour but was remarkably dry—and then returned Sarah Fork’s adaptor. Kuan is acting normal again; she doesn’t lock herself in the bathroom or my closet anymore. Back to the old routine of sleeping lots, and eating and using the litter box. I have no idea what she does when she stays outside. Someday I’ll strap a video camera to her back and follow around. Someday, but not today.
Hey, have you seen the new Spider-man movie trailer? Watch the full-length one, it’s the best. Totally cheesy and melodramatic, but the editing and effects and music are really well strung together. Tomorrow night is the opening. The Jazz Festival also kickes off tomorrow night, and runs for ten or eleven days. Fun times. Good thing lots of the shows are free.
-chris
DEAR PM 