from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Thu, Apr 1, 2010 at 4:37 PM
subject Budget Bachand: des manifestants font irruption dans le Centre de Commerce mondial ; RCMP ‘deeply sorry’ for Dziekanski’s death
Dear Stephen,
Sorry again for last night. I met up with Karen Tam direct after work at the MAC for the talk by Amelia Jones on the performance work of Bruce Nauman. The talk was OK, but for some reason it made me angry. I think I don’t like theorists all that much. Maybe I feel intimidated by their intelligence, or capacities with language, or maybe I dislike the attention to detail over things that seem to have little relevance or baring on current events or the political and economic status of contemporary artists. Or the fixation on inventing little tropes like the hinge, the bridge or infrathin. Every time she mentioned infrathin I kept thinking of crackers or wafers and how hungry I was. Also I dozed off a couple times, even though she was clear, concise and kept it short and sweet. And I liked her worthy digs at Marina Abramovic. My criticism of theorists is basically unfounded nonsense.
We had employment reviews at work yesterday, something the new management training has implemented. I passed, and will try to pitch for a modest raise, so that this year while paying off my taxes and other debts I will also be able to eat and enjoy modest luxuries in life, like having brunch with friends or dinners out on occasion. I could use some new clothes but that might have to wait until next year.
What do you think of the drastic, some might say draconian, across-the-board tax hikes the Charest government announced recently? It could be their death-knell, people seem pretty pissed about it. I don’t understand how a province can carry a deficit for a number of years, alongside the highest debt in the country, can give me a hard time over trying to stretch my repayment beyond 12 months. Talk about a double-standard!
I had a long conversation about arts funding in NB with Kate on the phone, she is writing an article about the subject for the TJ. I ranted and raved, as usual, with no real clear alternatives beside “more money”, and boy does that mantra grow tired quick.
On the plus side I finally finished reading Fall on Your Knees and was surprised about the whole lesbian turn of events, and that Kathleen ended up pregnant not because of a black man but because her own father raped her, how unpleasant.
Anyway, I am trying to get third space gallery grant and financial info organized for a big push this weekend as well as both mine and Claudine’s taxes, and I am not making much headway. Fuck I hate taxes. I am going through everything with a fine-tooth comb and I want to make sure I claim everything and then some, there is no way I am paying more taxes this year, I’ve already contributed more than my fair share, I’m clawing back. Money makes me go insane.
Last night Karen and I ate at St. Hubert downtown, watched the Habs lose again, they’ll probably not make the playoffs, especially if they play their remaining five game like they did last night. We talked about art and sex, two of my favourite subjects, though you might not guess from my letters as I certainly haven’t been divulging much about my sex life. Maybe I should talk more about sex now that I am blacking out most of the text anyway?
I am finally going to shave my beard, the weather is so nice, the sun just came out with such brilliance and the forecast calls for 27 degrees this Saturday, it is time for a major trim. I may not shave, just trim it down to to just stubble, as you know I hate dragging a razor over my face.
Claudine and Rose took the afternoon to visit Clo’s grandparents in St. Eustache, they will be home this evening. I’m going to head out to the John Baldessari opening at VOX. Going to trim first.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sun, Apr 4, 2010 at 12:14 AM
subject Harper chercherait un successeur à Michaëlle Jean; Canada’s planned electronic passports easy to hack, expert warns
Dear Stephen,
Sorry I didn’t write last night. Sarah came over with supper, a soup and cornbread she had made, and we watched Get Smart. I’ve been working on a revision project for Clo, she was hired to do the RCAAQ Directory of artist-run centres and I’m helping out. We also watched bits of the hockey game but not much. And tonight I didn’t even realize they were playing so I missed Halak’s back-to-back shutouts.
The weather has been crazy hot lately, so much so that we opened up the suitcases of summer clothing. It feels like summer, looks like summer, smells and tastes like summer. We’ve been going for slow, meandering walks that tire us out because it is so hot. Today I had 2 naps, but we also left the apartment on 4 different occasions: to meet Caroline and François for brunch at Le Coin G (which is a kind of play of words for the G-spot), and then for groceries at the market, and again to drop more apartment-related things in the basement, which led to a visit of our apartment by our other neighbours who live in the building, and then finally to meet Monica and Charlotte at le Buvette chez Simone. We had some wine, then walked up to St. Viateur for bagels, then caught the bus home.
So back to brunch. Everything was fine, breakfast was tasty, then Rose had an explosion in her diaper that I realized, as I was trying to change her in a tiny little washroom on the floor, that it was a liquid explosion that had crossed the diaper boundary and seeped under her clothing, into all her cracks and crevices, basically everywhere. It was a real smelly mess but I managed to clean her up with the wipes and a towel, and luckily we always keep a change of pyjamas in the diaper bag. I like how, despite the initial screaming, she then acts as though nothing has happened. We skyped later on with the family, mom and dad are visiting Trev and Tamara in Halifax for Easter.
Do you have special plans for Easter? We’re heading to Île Perot.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
sent Mon, Apr 5, 2010 at 9:02 PM
subject Députés et sénateurs devront mettre un frein à leurs voyages; Pardon for Graham James has Ottawa looking at new rules for sex offenders
Dear Stephen,
Do you ever put on music for your kids, then they fall asleep, then you realize you have been listening to Passe Partout for twenty minutes by yourself? Well, that happens to me. A little Bad Romance from Lady Gaga will drown out the toothbrush songs in my head. Raffi is part of the playlist as well. I love Raffi, I could listen to him all day. Actually, I can’t handle the thumping of Lady Gaga at the moment, I need something a little more low-key, maybe The National. Yeah, that’ll do it.
How was your Easter? We spent the afternoon out in Île Perrot, playing with Nataniel. Well, I spent the afternoon playing with him: hockey, catch, cars, chase, more hockey, more catch. He’s actually getting quite good, he can throw and most of the time in my general direction, and he can catch if the ball goes into his glove and doesn’t jump out, and when he plays hockey he doesn’t always try to score on his own net, though when he plays goalie he takes a dive at every shot, he’s worse than soccer players. It was exhausting, but fun. There is nothing like getting kids hopped up on cheap chocolate. And what do bunnies and chocolate have to do with Easter anyhow? After they hammered that guy up on the cross the bunnies hid chocolate eggs and then He returned three days later really, really hungry. For chocolate.
We spent today, a much-needed additional day off (who doesn’t need a five-day weekend?) working on home computer projects. Clo on translations, me on some revisions, also some preparatory grant-writing work for third space. Also I spent some time fiddling with my website, cleaning it up a bit since the transfer from google page creator to google sites messed up a bunch of my formatting. I shouldn’t complain, the sites are free. Also spent some time watching Passe Partout, Sesame Street and the Muppet Show clips on Youtube. Rose actually seems to follow the action, fascinated, but only if the actors are puppets or Muppets. Maybe kids dream and imagine things in puppet form? Maybe this is why puppets are so appealing?
Last night we watched Rear Window and I have an idea to capture all the scenes where James Stewart is seen watching from the window, and stringing them together into one long video of just him, just him looking out, but we would never see what it is he is looking at. It would be a kind of self-reflective comment on the nature of watching, the mutable roles of spectator and performer, something like that. I have to find the time to work on more video projects, which basically means I need to give up sleeping, or writing to you, or doing third space things, or spending time with my wife and daughter, or going to work. I’m sure I can find some time somewhere.
Spending fifty minutes on Skype with my parents also cuts into art/video-making time, but it is worth it, and they appreciate it a lot. Today I had Rose in the colourful, plastic airplane that Jo lent us, which is a great device. Like a Jolly Jumper, but without the jumping, or the harness. Rose likes being in it, as it supports her upper body enough that her head doesn’t flop around too much.
Anyway, this letter has taken hours to make already, and I still have laundry on the line to bring in. Claudine went to see the biopic Gainsbourg tonight. I’ve already bottle-fed Rose, and have just put her down. Now I should be doing more online work but really I just want to watch a hockey game or read a magazine. I can’t crunch a budget or make a final report right now, I feel fried. And I have just read that Disney offered a refund on Baby Einstein videos; now I’m glad we haven’t gotten into them yet. We had just started looking for them on Youtube. Now apparently it isn’t good for babies less than 2-years old to look at screens. Kind of makes sense, if you think about it.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Fri, Apr 9, 2010 at 12:08 AM
subject Ottawa dénonce le baptème d’une rue palestinienne du nom d’un «terroriste»; Guergis’s future in doubt; husband Jaffer faces more accusations
Dear Stephen,
Sorry I haven’t written in a couple days. You know how life can get busy, and one has to prioritize. Lately for me that means working on third space grants while procrastinating by meddling into New Brunswick art and political issues. Early this morning I took the rental van to the eco centre, unloaded a bunch of James’ building material that a bunch of us had removed from his building last night, then gassed up and returned the van. Cam back home with croissants for breakfast, Rose had a poop, a small one, but she has certainly become more regular; we enjoyed coffee and then I received a phone call from Mike Landry, who is writing a series of reports on the state of the arts in NB. And let me tell you, as I peck away at the ridiculous amount of paper-and-pencil pushing required on the provincial grant form, all for a measly 10 to 15-thousand, why, it is ridiculous, it makes steam come out of my ears. And the province is wondering why it can’t keep the best and the brightest? Now that the second oil refinery is nothing more than aftertaste, and the Irving World Headquarters an afterthought, the city wants to call itself a “Creative Hub“. No more Energy Hub, but how on Earth can it be a Creative Hub with no university fine art or architecture program? No dance, theatre, it is all just skin of the teeth. So pardon me for being highly suspicious, pessimistic and critical of all this talk, especially amongst the Saint John 225 celebrations, which all indications seem to lead one to believe that art is nothing more than an MC or a clown, a pleasant old gentleman who resembles The Loyalist Man and whom mirth and gay merriment follow. Golly, I don’t know why I am so bitter, or where it comes from. I mean, I haven’t even lived in SJ for more than 2 years, which of course begs the question, why am I still involved with third space and why do I still torment myself at this time of year with multiple grant applications? Why am I still awake surfing the ‘net when my wife and daughter are already asleep? And speaking of Rose, she was the belle of the ball again tonight at the CCA opening, though she wasn’t the only baby, Femke was there as well. The two girls are charmers, and very happy babies. I love nothing more than to hold Rose and walk around with her in my arms. The way she looks at me turns my heart to mush. So just to wrap up, the other night we watched Lost online after missing it live on Tuesday, because Clo had a WWKA rehearsal and Caro and François were babysitting Rose so I went to their apartment and we watched the Habs lose a heartbreaker to the Islanders. Not as bad as losing to Carolina tonight, as at least they gained a point, but at this rate even if they make the playoffs they’ll probably just bow out after the first round. And who wants to watch hockey in June, anyhow?
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sat, Apr 10, 2010 at 11:59 PM
subject Ottawa prêt à continuer à former la police afghane; Polish PM cancels visits to Canada, US
Dear Stephen,
So the Habs have squeaked into the playoffs with an overtime loss to the Maple Leafs. We watched the last four minutes of regulation from Jack and Aurelia’s house; they had invited us over to celebrate a Seder, or Passover. Yes, I know it is a bit late, but this is the time it worked out best for their families, and Jack and Sarah’s dad couldn’t even be there, he has travelled too much recently, including a long voyage to India. Anyway, you know I am not that religious and certainly not Jewish, though tonight I did wear one of those little hats. It was certainly fun to participate and hear about how “you shall tell it to your son on that day, saying, ‘Because of this God did for us when He took me out of Egypt.” I have never been to Egypt but would love to visit someday. Ever since I was a kid I have been fascinated with the pyramids. There was lots of wine, and the kids loved poking Rose, and she was relatively well-behaved, though it seems as if she may be coming down with a mild cold. Clo has been sick for the past few days, she even lost her voice a couple days ago.
Last night we went to a performance of the Women With Kitchen Appliances, Claudine’s first appearance with the group as an official member, outside of the WWKA Army appearance at the triennial a couple years back. This performance was as part of a fundraiser / 20-year celebration of a textile school that I didn’t even know existed before. The performance was great, classic WWKA except now they are wearing spooky makeup. Rose made a fuss, I think the noise or lack of attention in her direction got to her, but we listened from the next room, where it wasn’t as intense.
I’ve been working on grants for third space quite intently the past few days, it is making my brain hurt. It is odd that the provincial paper, the Telegraph Journal, has been running all these stories about funding in the arts, and what the future may hold. It should be good for dialogue, but all it does it bring on comments from idiots and retards, and make me more angry about spending more than a week of intense work filling out endless forms and statistical information and tracking down proof of every event and motion made at board meetings, all for a measly 10 or 12 or maybe, if we could be so lucky, 15 grand. For a years funding, it is unreal.
I’m going to go try to stuff another pill down Manu’s throat. We’ll take her to the vet on Monday to see if the quantity is good, even though we’ve changed it ourselves to one pill per day, as it is just easier this way. She hides in the morning and is so hard to track down, giving her half a pill every twelve hours is ridiculous. She already seems healthier, a little more plump, and has only puked once in a month, as far as we can tell.
Rose had another explosion this morning while at a restaurant with Clo and her friend Nicole, who was up from Louisiana for a conference. She is shitting almost once per day now. It means I am hand-washing a lot more diapers.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sun, Apr 11, 2010 at 10:23 PM
subject Sommet sur la sécurité nucléaire: Harper sera à Washington; Canadian soldier killed in Afghan blast
Dear Stephen,
I must go to sleep soon, My eyes feel crossed and my head is numb. It is the NB operating grant that is doing a number on me, the written body of the grant has just topped 10,000 words, which is ridiculous when you know we will get a minimum ten grand, it is like $1 per word. And that is not even counting the support material! Those brainless, bureaucratic fuckers in the Department of Wellness, Culture and Sport make me lose my mind. At least almost the whole board, especially Alison and Judith and Jacqueline and Amy, have been actively supporting and working, sending texts and info to help build up the application. John too, but the calibre of his writing is terrible. I mean, who spells haiku “hi-koo”? Who doesn’t know how to spellcheck in 2010? Enough complaining, he is working hard too, trying to get final reports finished, but I have to proofread everything he writes and it is painful, really. But I did have a nice visit today with François Lemieux at his apartment. We had missed the opening of the latest show in his project We Left The Warm Stable And Entered The Latex Void, it was a collaborative exhibition by Sylvain Baumann and Florine Leoni, very well done! The room had been painted a high-gloss white, a high-intensity fluorescent light lit the room, an aluminum bar was installed to keep the visitors to the first quarter of the room, and the golden puzzle-pieces on the wall were from a found aluminum map of Canada that the artists had re-figured, re-cut, and re-assembled into a bizarre pattern on the wall. It was very impressive. Even more impressive, he offered me an exhibition, but it will be in 2 weeks, as the WLTWSAETLV project had a finish date of May 1. Jon Knowles will be the final show, and I will exhibit a mix of the hockey and PM projects, together to celebrate either a victory or loss of the Canadiens in post-season play. The date of the show will be either the 21, 22 or 23 of April, depending on which is a game night. The schedule is not available at this time, as far as I can tell. I am thinking to exhibit my version of the Stanley Cup, which needs some work, book editions of all the letters, which means I need to publish 2009, and then order copies, which will cost $, perhaps the redacted texts on the walls, and the hockey video in the living room. Maybe paint a big Montreal Canadiens logo on the wall. They are supposedly Canada‘s team, though I know you prefer the Leafs or the Flames. But then again, they aren’t in the playoffs at all this year, so will you suddenly become a Habs fan?
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Tue, Apr 13, 2010 at 10:56 PM
subject Harper assistera aux funérailles de Kaczynski à Cracovie; Guergis rejects claims Jaffer used her office for personal business
Dear Stephen,
All my free time as of late has been devoted to getting the god-damned NB Operating Grant finished. I just sent it off, Alison will print it tomorrow – 6 copies of the 20-page grant, plus 6 copies of the 3-page application, plus financial statements, copy of the standard exhibition contract, minutes of the last AGM, year-end report and six copies of our most recent publication. I emailed the publisher today asking if she would deliver them for us, as they are located in Fredericton as well. Haven’t heard back yet; maybe it was an unreasonable request? My back hurts. I need to go to bed, I need to sleep off this stench, this greasy feeling I have all over from this stupid grant. I fear I am developing an unhealthy hatred of bureaucrats.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Thu, Apr 15, 2010 at 10:47 PM
subject Torture: il ne revient pas à la police militaire d’enquêter, dit un officier; Guergis flatly denies cocaine allegations
Dear Stephen,
Sorry for not writing yesterday. When I came home from work Rose was sick, her nose was completely stuffed up with snot and she was having difficulty breathing. Needless to say, Claudine and I were kind of freaking out, we were reading up on different sites and in our books what to do, because as you must know it is impossible to coax a 3-month old baby to blow her own nose. What ends up happening is that she quasi-vomits up a bunch of snot. So she was fussy, crying a lot, exhausted, trying to sleep but fitfully so. I went to the pharmacy and picked up some baby aspirin, which seemed to have helped because by 6am she was almost back to her normal, bouncy, happy self. But during the night she was up every couple hours and at one point had a gross, smelly, liquid shit, poor thing.
I spent the entire day working on a project grant for third space, deciding only this morning on three artists, including Karen Tam, a series of interventions and collaborations with the Chinese community in Saint John. Hopefully we are successful as it was the only project I submitted. John applied to the Saint John Community Arts Funding Program for a the unclear new media arts festival, in partnership somehow with the French Consulate and the unknown-of Bang Collective, and even though his grant-writing skills are not the best – they are negligible at best – he will probably be successful because I have a feeling they award grants to whoever applies. I don’t think there are a ton of eligible organizations, but really, what do I know about it?
Claudine left with Monica and Chantal to go to a spa in Rawdon for the evening. The girls deserve it. I took Rose to the post office to mail the grant support material, then we walked to Canadian Tire to pick up the car. Claudine had dropped it off yesterday to replace the winter tires and have the brakes fixed. After all was said and done we received 4 new all-season tires, oil change, new brakes for the rear, new windshield wipers and a repaired hand brake, all for only $733.62. All these bills keep adding up, and we had even borrowed $500 from Claudine’s parents in anticipation of the new tires. My visa bill came in, I owe $200 on that, plus the $7,700 that was transferred to my parents’ credit line a couple months ago, plus my taxes, I still owe a couple hundred on my federal, and over $4,200 on my provincial. And they wonder why I can’t pay it off all at once or afford $360 per month! We were supposed to be debt-free by 2012, which I guess is still technically possible, but it seems that life keeps getting in the way. And an old 1999 Corolla.
I’m listening to the hockey game on the radio and I think it is giving me high blood pressure, or an anxiety attack…holy shit the Habs just won! 3-2 in overtime with a goal by Plekanec. Incredible! This means there will for sure be a Game 5, which will be the same night as my show at François’ WLTWSAETLV apartment gallery. I have some work to do to complete some books and objects for that show. But first: tomorrow, I absolutely, positively must finish my taxes, and Clo’s taxes, and send the info to Kim.
Oh, and I Skyped with my parents again tonight, with my Aunt Vicki. They are all driving down to Kitty Hawk tomorrow for a couple weeks. Don’t worry, they are bringing their computer so they can Skype with their granddaughter while they are away. I don’t think they could last even one week without contact.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sat, Apr 17, 2010 at 11:18 PM
subject Colis suspect devant Radio-Canada: fausse alerte; Harper, opposition cancel trip to Poland
Dear Stephen,
Rose was really fussy and cranky this morning. Claudine had left in the morning to go shopping, and after a bit of a nap Rose wouldn’t drink from the bottle. She fussed and fussed and would only calm down while I was carrying her. Finally, as I was seriously thinking of cancelling our afternoon out, she drank a bottle and was calm when I put her in the stroller. We ran half a block to catch the bus. We were meeting Clo at the Armoury on Bleury for the AGAC Contemporary Art Fair of Works on Paper, and then the openings at Skol. Rose was well-behaved for all events, stealing the show and sucking attention and energy everywhere she goes. People do indeed love babies, at least when they are all coy and cute. Tonight after we came home we made grilled cheese sandwiches and listened to the Habs and Caps on the radio. What a seesaw match! The Habs will have to be able to hold onto leads better if they hope to take this series. Always a heart breaker to lose, especially in overtime, but at least it wasn’t a blowout. Series tied 1-1, not a bad place to be in coming back to Montreal for home games. While listening to the match I was working on repairing my Stanley Cup, the one made from shredded letters to the PM that I first made in Chicoutimi. Yes, I still have it, and plan to exhibit it at François’ apartment next Friday for my show, called Go Habs Go!
The interview I did with the TJ was published this weekend, I’m too tired to write much more so I’ll paste whole text below. Don’t worry it is not that long. There were five or six similar interviews, including with Jay Isaac and Peter Dykhuis. Rose was fussy again tonight, crying uncontrollably, we can’t tell if she is sick, if it is colic, we have no idea. Babies aren’t that good at explaining what is wrong. Maybe she just needed a good cry? She was practically inconsolable.
I hear you cannot go to Poland for the funerals because of the massive cloud of ash and dust hanging over the Atlantic form that volcano. What a crazy event. How long does the crossing take by boat? Wouldn’t it be wild if all current trans-Atlantic trafffic reverted back to boats? OK, here is my text, I need to redact and then get to bed.
“In his words: Money does speak volumes. It kind of does come down to the province. It is kind of slow and behind in terms of what it funds for visual artists … The funding never reflects what the (artist-run) centres are doing … $10,000 or $13,000 a year to run a professional arts organization? What do you do with that kind of money? … If you can’t afford to pay someone a decent salary to do the work to actually find the grants or fundraise or do the kinds of things that would keep your organization above water, then you’re constantly going to be drowning – or just treading water.
We’re always told from all the levels of the funders that you need to find more corporate sponsorship or private money, but that’s a whole other level of professionalism that these organizations often don’t have. We don’t have the contacts, we don’t have the know-how. The artist-run centres and the artist-run culture is artist-run. At its core is artists, who are focused mostly on making work and presenting it. (Fundraising) takes either a stroke of luck or having people who know how to work that – and that’s a different type of art. I’m not knocking it, it’s just not a skill that most artists have.
We can talk to ourselves, we know how to talk to art historians, we know how to talk to curators, but the biggest problem is often with the general public, who maybe don’t have much idea or insight into what’s happening in the contemporary arts world … I think most people, when presented with facts, or even just common sense, would realize there’s nothing wrong with having money going into the arts … even if you don’t personally like a particular work, having artists work in your community improves your quality of life. I don’t know how many gazillion studies have been done to try and show that if people don’t believe it.“
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Mon, Apr 19, 2010 at 10:09 PM
subject Pardons: Harper dénonce le cas de Karla Homolka; Jaffer, business partner, face grilling by parliamentary committee
Dear Stephen,
There are a couple things I have forgotten to tell you about. First was my Lulu order, which I made last week after finishing editing volume 9 (letters written to you in 2009). I sent the order but forgot to check the shipping option, and it turned out I picked mail, which takes 8-10 business days, which would mean the books would arrive well after the one-day show at WLTWSAETLV. This would be $200 not well spent. But I sent a few emails to Lulu support and this is what came back (a response, yes, something you don’t do with me):
“I have upgraded your shipping as a one-time customer accommodation. Usually we are unable to do this because of the automated feed sent to the vendor with all of the information regarding the orders. It is only at our NY vendor that we have any ability to change shipping information once an order is in progress, and we will be eating the cost of the difference for this order, so in the future please double check your shipping information before submitting your order. Also, this is no guarantee that your order will reach you by Friday. It looks as if most of the books in your order have been printed, but even if this ships out tomorrow morning sometimes customs can hold up books going across the border, so please be patient.
Have a great day!
Cory H.
Lulu Enterprises, Inc.”
Yesterday was busy for us, for a Sunday. First we had Stephen and Monica over for brunch. Stephen had driven up from SJ the day before, for their last week of classes. It is hard to believe the semester is almost over for them! Their house is free of oil, BTW. They still have some renovations to do in the basement and they are already looking hard for land to build their prefab prototype. We also spoke again of buying a big chunk of land on the Peninsula, not waterfront, just a big enough chunk for a bunch of us to build our own cabins, our own little community.
In the evening we had some of the AC crew over for a paella to celebrate Elie’s birthday. Kent and Anne and Laurent came as well and it was a fun night but a little too late, given that we haven’t been sleeping much since Rose has had her ear infection. Did I tell you about it? Yesterday morning we found a pool of gooey pus in her ear, which explained her crankiness and ceaseless crying. She has an ear infection, and this morning, after another fitful night (she was up maybe 3-4 times), we decided to take her to our doctor. We debated the emergency, then another walk-in clinic, but in the end we thought her own doctor would be best. We only had to wait a couple hours in the waiting room, then our doctor saw us and prescribed some antibiotics. Let me tell you, it is hard to watch your child being examined and crying and screaming and in such discomfort and there is nothing you can do about it. Afterwards, we came home for lunch (leftovers), then I went to work for the afternoon. Measurements.
I’m listening to the game but might just turn it off in disgust. Already 4-1 for the Caps, Halak pulled in the second period after the third goal, now into the third period, I don’t have much hope. Do you think they can come back from a deficit and take this series? How much does collective hope play a part? And why do we collectively cheer behind sporting teams, claiming them to be heroes for towards some sort of unconscious nation-building. Whet even defines a home team anymore? local owners? local players? Whatever we call it, it still sucks when the home team loses. There, I’ve shut off the radio, but mostly because I can’t stand the ads. And all this after I bought three small Canadiens shirts for Rose, a selection for her to wear on Friday.
Rose is sleeping, as we should, too. Best to catch up on the sleep when the baby does. I spoke too soon, she’s awake and fussing again, poor thing. Maybe I’ll go see if my Stanley Cup repairs are drying fast enough. I might have to put some of the pieces in the oven.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Wed, Apr 21, 2010 at 11:58 PM
subject Génocide au Rwanda: le Canada s’excuse pour son inaction; Jaffer denies wrongdoing, drug use before Commons committee
Dear Stephen,
The antibiotics seem to be working, Rose is feeling a bit better. I spoke to Clo from work yesterday and she said that Rose was even smiling today, something that I missed, unfortunately. I had a CA meeting at SKOL after work and she was asleep when I got home. The CA was fine, just a little dull, as I’m sure most are. You must find so many committee and board meetings incredibly boring. This morning I was later for work because I hng around the apartment waiting for Rose to wake up and smile for me. She did, finally.
Today there was some minor excitement at work, as the police came to block access to the dumpster in behind the building the gallery satellite spaces are located in. The cops just stood around nonchalantly, most of the time with the motor of their vehicles running. They blocked the road and everything. There was police tape wrapped around the dumpster and the cops yelled at anyone who tried to cross it. By the end of the day the tape and the cops were gone, without a trace. I guess there wasn’t a body or anything severed found inside. So in the end it wasn’t terribly exciting, after all.
Neither was the hockey game terribly exciting. I stopped listening after the second period, hoping that by not listening I might less jinx the team, and they might be able to carry on to win, even after a demoralizing shorthanded goal tied the game for the Caps. I should have known that was a bad sign. Do you think starting Price tonight instead of Halak was good strategy? Do you think that the Habs are just not strong enough to take down the Caps? I decided to watch Lost instead, while eating really bad cuts of salmon bought from that grocery store on Laurier, near St. Denis. Way too bony. Anyway, I don”t know what is going on with the writers on Lost, the plot is getting even more convoluted than ever. I think I am anxious for it to end, and I am doubting that they will be able to do justice to the five years of twisted, time-traveling, multiple timeline narratives. Are you following it?
I went for beers with Stacy and Jon at the Victoria Pub after work. We talked about art and guilt and work and all sorts of things, except girls, oddly enough. We joke around enough like male chauvinistic pigs at work, almost as if for an invisible audience, but then alone we are perfect gentlemen. What gives?
Tomorrow I don’t work but I’ll be installing the show at François’. Currently, there are parts of the cup in the oven. They are not drying fast enough. I have to burn a video and of course make sure I do not leave paper in the oven that can burn. Claudine gave a me a great, long, hard back massage last night, which I found ticklish at times, but boy did I need it. My back has been killing me lately. Do you ever experience back pain? What do you do about it?
I just finished reading All the pretty horses, by Cormac McCarthy. A little too much detail about horses and bridles, but overall I liked the story, it felt unusual, not forced, not traditional and certainly not typical. I admit, I was surprised when they were collected and thrown in jail on trumped up charges, and it felt quite bleak. And the fact that the lovers don’t live happily ever after, well that is a change of pace. Not that I am complaining or anything. Honestly, being a father is an amazing gift, and I feel it has changed my life so much for the better, but at the same time, I am still very much the same. I still like sex, of course with my partner, and still imagine it with others, but I also feel that now I am much less likely to seek it out. Not that I have been, but I feel the whole desire has been diminished to a barely noticeable trickle. And it is not like I am lacking at home, but just the lust for adventure has ceased considerably. And even though I am now cycling to work, on Claudine’s bike, since mine is a piece of shit and still locked up to a pole outside with the key lost, and all the pretty girls of Montreal either bike as well or walk beside me, constant temptation, it does nothing, and all I think about is my taxes or my art.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Tue, Apr 27, 2010 at 9:00 PM
subject Pays en développement: le Canada ne financera pas les avortements; Two weeks given to resolve detainee issue
Dear Stephen,
Did you watch that game last night? What an incredible performance by Halak. I watched from Miss Villeray, with Etienne and Rose. Clo came to get her when the second period started, as it was a bit too noisy and a bit too crowded for her. I changed a diaper behind the projection screen, for example. Because the Habs won I am becoming more superstitious and feel the need to bring her to the next game, tomorrow. Etienne plans to bring Femke, the girls all decked out in Habs fangear. François and Caro joined us for the final period, it was so intense. Do you think they can pull another inspired performance like that together tomorrow? I guess we will find out soon enough.
Caro came over for supper tonight to discuss the “career day” that she and Claudine are going to tomorrow evening. It is nice to have the fields of writing, translation and the contemporary visual arts represented for high school students. I’m sure if you had your way these fields would not exist. I am beginning to wonder about your supposed enthusiasm for culture, or at least the piano, and of course hockey, though that is only in the broadest sense cultural, it is more sportive. And what is with this whole anti-abortion stance heading into the G8? For crying out loud how retrograde could you possibly get? I just wish the rest of the politicians in Parliament (hello Michael and the Liberals, a direct call-out to you) forget about polls and just call or trigger a fucking election already so we can throw you, and the hillbilly bunch of idiots you call a minority government, out on your asses. It has been far too long and Canadians have been far too apathetic and subdued. We let you get away with far too much. What do you think you are, god’s gift to Canadian democracy?
In other news, sad news, our former landlord Bill Cooper passed away yesterday. It all happened so fast! He was at our baby shower / saint john party, and then suddenly had stomach cancer and now he is gone. He was the best landlord I ever had, and a thoughtful and generous soul. He gave so much of himself, was so helpful, honest, giving. Life is short, one must grab it by the horns. I think Bill did that, and I have to remember to do that as well. Live life to the fullest. Take care of my little girl. Adore her. Show her the beautiful things in life, how wonderful the experience of living can be. And how to cheat on taxes, especially when buffoons run governments.
If you ever have sleepless nights about your decisions, if any guilt ever slips into your conscience that perhaps what you are doing is not in the best interests of the country but of yourself and your cronies, or if you realize that your kids are growing up too fast and you’ve not the time to spend with them, I hope you remember and realize that you brought this on yourself. You wanted to be Prime Minister. You’ve been working hard these past few years to shape Canada in your own image. You’re doing all that you can to weaken arts and culture, and making us look like idiots on the world stage. Just remember, once we do throw you out, and you are left without all your special PMO powers and privileges, you’ll remain just what you’ve been all along: an asshole.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Thu, Apr 29, 2010 at 1:11 PM
subject Rahim Jaffer a multiplié les contacts avec des ministères; Health Canada warns parents about crib problems
Dear Stephen,
Can you even believe it? The Canadiens eliminate the Capitals? What an incredible comeback! Did you watch the game? I made plans to meet Etienne at Miss Villeray, but there were complications. I picked Rose up from Clo at Oboro, and she was fussy when I tried to feed her, she is not liking the bottle lately. When I got to Miss Villeray Etienne was just leaving; he had been kicked out because he had Femke with him. Normally the owners are OK with babies there, after all I was there with Rose for Game 6, but last night a Radio Canada TV crew was there and the owner was worried about getting fined. Apparently it is illegal for babies to be in bars! So we decided to catch a bus to the Mile End and watch the game from Café Romolo, as we knew that with their license under suspension there would be no problem finding a table. We saw that L’Assommoir was screening the game and decided to stop there, as the food was better. It was a good choice, there was a DJ playing dub all night, we had a table, there were cute girls everywhere, our girls were good, and the Canadiens won. We shared a couple cigarettes outside afterwards, I haven’t smoked at all since January, maybe one or two cigarettes in total. I missed the bus home as I was pissing in an alleyway. Walked home along Boulevard St-Laurent listening to the car horns celebrating everywhere. Maybe sporting events have the potential to bring about feelings of peace and euphoria. All I know is that I was almost overcome with feelings of extreme love and devotion to my girls, Clo and Rose, and it didn’t have a lot to do with the match itself. It was more the sheer joy of sharing in the experience with my daughter, whom I love and adore.
Today we will clean the apartment, and put up a few more pictures. We finally found the Colin Smith drawing, and Rebecca’s teeth drawing, and a few other small pictures, tucked into a suitcase that I thought was full of my junk. We thought we had lost these pictures in the move so it was nice to find them. Also today I have to take Manu to the vet and see if her thyroid medication is the correct dosage. We stuff a half-pill down her throat twice daily, but it is hard to do it on an exact schedule.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Fri, Apr 30, 2010 at 10:54 AM
subject Une ancienne ministre refoulée au Mexique; Canada’s economy grows 0.3 per cent in February
Dear Stephen,
Do you have a cell phone? If so, what company do you use? As you know, I re-signed a 3-year contract with Telus a couple years ago. This despite having already been with them and payed a couple hundred dollars to end a contract. So recently the phone ceased to function. Something to do with some water. Yesterday afternoon, after the trip to the vet to have Manu tested and buying more thyroid medication, I stopped by a Telus dealer on St. Hubert, fully expecting a replacement phone. Why the hell not? I’ll tell you why not, because the phone only had a 1-year warranty. The guy at the counter told me it would cost $100 to replace the phone. You know me; I completely lost it. Well, not completely. All I did was shout a little, and had the guy call the service centre for me, where I proceeded to yell at not one rep but two, this time on the phone. By the time I was screaming at the third Rose had woken up and joined me in filling the store with screams of anguish. I was hoping to terrorize anyone who came within earshot. Still no dice. I had visions of throwing objects through the trendy display cases, shattering glass and expensive Blackberries, grabbing the computer monitors and smashing them to the ground, throwing bricks through the plate-glass display windows and burning their anthropomorphic billboards to the ground. Instead I removed every add-on feature I possibly could, then came home and joined the I Hate Telus Facebook page. I called another rep in Malaysia, as this is where they have moved their call centres, and screamed some more. Now we’re looking for a free or very cheap secondhand Telus phone just to use for the rest of the term of the contract, which is about 15 months. If I can get out of the contract earlier I will. Maybe I won’t pay them ever again. This has got to be the worst crack-dealing company ever in terms of customer service or loyalty. I’ve “subsidized” my first, free $100-dollar phone to a tune of almost $900 last year alone. Their fucked-up user fees, system access fees, 911-fees, fees fees fees make me so angry I could easily be brought to commit physical violence on them. I will rain down on this company like boiling red lava, I’ll smash them like cheap trinkets, I’ll smear their pretty advertising with smelly feces.They will rue the day they took me on as a customer.
Anyway, we’re off to Québec to visit Fannie and Sebastien and as well see the opening day for Manif d’Art 5: Catastrophe? Quelle Catastrophe!
-chris
DEAR PM 