from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Tue, May 4, 2010 at 1:02 PM
subject Fwd: bad, bad customer service; Menu chargé pour Harper en Europe; RCMP tighten rules on use of Tasers
Dear Stephen,
Sorry I haven’t written lately. We went to Québec City on Friday, watched the Habs lose while eating supper at Fannie and Seb’s, then spent all day Saturday attending various Manif d’art openings. Rose was a trooper, she was up with us until about 11pm, it was a full, full day. She ended it with a petit catastrophe of her own, a nice full diaper. Sunday we drove back home and listened in the car on the way to the Habs, courtesy of Fortress Halak, win Game 2. Yesterday was work and then a visit from Mohanad in the evening. We also had to take Kuan to the vet on Monday as we found her pissing blood Sunday night. After spending $120 on Manu last week for her blood tests and medication, it was another $120 for Kuan. Aaaarg.
I am forwarding my recent letter to Telus president Darren Entwistle. I am still waiting on a second phone, my brother Aaron offered to give me a phone if he upgrades, and Amy has a Bell phone she will give me, and Brodie has a phone he will give me but I would have to ship it from Vancouver. I will keep you posted.
———- Forwarded message ———-
From: chris lloyd <dearpm@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, May 4, 2010 at 12:35 PM
Subject: bad, bad customer service
To: darren.entwistle@telus.com
Hi Darren,
I am writing you to express my dissatisfaction with your company Telus. My phone recently died and when I brought it in to be replaced I was told it would cost $100 to replace the phone as it was no longer under warranty. I think it is in bad taste to sign customers to a 3-year contract with a warranty on a device for only 1-year. Considering the amount of money I have paid to your company in the past 2 years I have above and beyond paid for the “subsidized” free phone in the first place. Also, I think the “system access” fees are a sham and an insult. In short, I am an incredibly dissatisfied customer and will seeking ways to terminate my contract early. At no point throughout my relationship with your company was I ever made to feel welcome or needed. Not only will I not be staying with your company but I will in fact do all in my power to recommend that friends, family and work associates not consider Telus as their mobile carrier of choice. Good luck with the hippo campaign, and have a nice day.
Sincerely,
chris lloyd
—
Chris Lloyd Projects
dearpm.blogspot.com
thirdspacegallery.ca
7238, avenue Henri-Julien ° Montréal [Québec] ° H2R 2A8
m. 514 727 3511 ° c. 514 295 3048
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sat, May 8, 2010 at 2:42 PM
subject Bernier vendra les «valeurs conservatrices» au Québec; Harper blames ‘certain governments’ for economic turbulence
Dear Stephen,
Sorry for not writing recently. Last night I finished work early and had some beer with Stacy and James at Vices et Versa. Thursday night we watched the game at Stacy’s apartment, fashioning a mini-theatre setup with his couches in the living room. Nice come-from-behind victory for the Habs, eh? Sweet wraparound goal by Lapierre and then a weird, lucky deflection off a Pens player to win the game. Any predictions for tonight? Are you going to stay up late and watch the game from Germany? Are you getting any more flack from the EU over your stance to not tax the banks? How about your slow withdrawal of aid to family organizations that support right to choose policies? Your government frustrates me almost as much as Telus. Speaking of Telus I had telephone messages as well as this email from the Executive Customer Relations Advisor, here is the email:
RE: Account # 15941723
Dear Mr. Lloyd,
Thank you for bringing your concern to our attention.
I have attempted to contact you by telephone with no success. I would ask that you contact me directly at 514-832-5376 or toll free 1-800-505-3355 extension 5376 at your earliest convenience, to discuss your concern.
I would like to thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Vanessa Bazile
Executive Customer Relations Advisor
TELUS
I tried to call her back but she must not work weekends. Iliana gave me her old phone which I tried to bring in to Telus but the same service rep said that they couldn’t (or wouldn’t) hook up a Fido phone. I suspect that anything is possible wiht telecommunications, and these fuckers are just playing with my ignorance. I refuse to pay them any more of my money, I won’t stop harassing them until I get a replacement phone at no cost and end my contract so I can switch to a service provider that understands what service means. Actually I am doubtful any of them are not much different.
Thursday night I was a tad drunk, and stayed up late, reading, surfing the web, distracting myself from the absence of my wife and daughter, whom I miss already even though it is just a few days. Today is massive apartment cleanup and organization day. Just as well as it is freezing outside. Off to clean the bathroom. Tonight is an opening at Silver Flag (David and Iliana’s gallery) of new work by Jay Isaac. I plan to meet up with Lucas Dambergs there and then find somewhere to watch the game. Hard to believe but it might even snow tonight. But first: a mid-afternoon beer, and some music from The National.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Mon, May 10, 2010 at 10:42 PM
subject Immeubles fédéraux: la firme PWC scrutera les dépenses; Godfrey’s group to buy Canwest for $1.1 billion
Dear Stephen,
I was on pins and needles all day yesterday waiting for my girls to arrive home. I missed them terribly, and made special effort to clean the house as thoroughly as possible. I washed load after load of laundry, organized diapers, rearranged, cleaned and cleaned some more. I vacuumed the whole apartment and mopped, too. Even cleaned the bathroom, twice. The girls arrived just past seven, by then the chicken I had put in the slow cooker earlier in the day was as tender as could be.
(cbcsports recap and mild Facebook reverie)
Where was I? Today was the first day of the de-install at work, smooth going so far. Called the Telus president secretary again but got her answering machine…again. Got into ashouting match with a driver who ran the red at my street corner. Sure, I had shoved my bike tire into the side of his car as it passed, but he says I was in the wrong. I think standing in the middle of the road gives him even less right to run the red. I think I should start carrying a short stick with me at all times, so I can lob off the side-view mirrors as they pass.
Had an appointment with an osteopath nearby. I didn’t realize that she would be so attractive, or that I would be hanging around in my underwear as she bent and plied me into various pretzel-like positions. There seems to have been some results as well, my back feels strange, and oddly refreshed, yet tired at the same time. She is moving some vertebrae around, and claims my right lung is not taking in as much air. Also that I have bad posture. I am to do some exercises at home to help limber up my back muscles.
Came home, Sarah was here making burritos, I gave Rose a bath. She was a bit cranky tonight, crying a high-pitched scream, but she calmed in the bath and just kept staring at me with her big blue eyes. She was so tired, she fell asleep within seconds after I put her in her bed.
I watched some of the third period of the Habs game online but missed all the goals, including the crazy one by Laprierre. Who’d have thought that there would be a Game 7? Do you have any money riding on the series? Are you a betting man?
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Thu, May 13, 2010 at 9:46 PM
subject Grabuge au centre-ville: les commerçants amers; Tell me what I allegedly did, Guergis demands
Dear Stephen,
What a night! I went to Stacy’s to watch the game and was so nervous I drank four extra-strong PBRs by the end of the first period. Iliana was sure that the Habs would win but that kind of confidence makes me all the more nervous. Do you think that they are a destiny team this year? The city has officially gone hockey-crazy. I mean, even non-fans and those that don’t follow have been caught up in the madness. And I’m not talking about the thugs who do all the looting and vandalism, they are just opportunistic, and wait for those rare big wins in order to steal shoes and booze.
After the game we made ourselves hoarse with random cheering at passing pedestrians, then went to Casa del Popolo for a nightcap. We ran into Etienne there but I didn’t stay too long, already losing my ability to focus. Somehow I managed to bike home, even filmed some of the voyage with my camera, then stayed up until 2 reading about the miraculous comeback. Needless to say, I was a bit of a zombie at work today. Even so, the team was effective and we are more or less back on schedule, the exhibition all down and even the major demolition in G5 completed.
I have also almost resolved the whole Telus situation. I finally spoke to the president’s secretary and she said they will make an exception and give me a replacement phone. In fact I think it came already, but by Purolator, and since I wasn’t home I have to drive to Anjou to get it. Almost as annoying as paying the $50 or so that they had offered me. Oh well. What a saga! What a debacle! Well, at least not a complete catastrophe like the oil in the Gulf of Mexico. I signed an Aavaz petition to urge the US to ban all offshore drilling. You should sign it. You should stop the whole Tar Sands debacle while we’re at it. Stupid Tar Sands.
I’m making a sauce for ribs, and will put them in the slow-cooker tomorrow morning before leaving for work. Greg and Rebecca are coming for supper, they are flying in to Montreal for a family get-together this weekend, so we get to hang out first. It is also Greg’s birthday. And Monday my parents come up with my aunt Margo, who is undergoing tests to see if she can withstand experimental treatments for her MS in India. My dad will stay a couple days and drive back with my aunt and uncle and my mom will stay almost a week. This will be interesting. Claudine is visiting her parents right now, I have been without my girls for another couple days already. I miss them! But right now I am thoroughly exhausted and will try to get to bed early.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Wed, May 19, 2010 at 9:47 PM
subject Question des jeunes à Harper: «il n’y a eu aucune censure»; Blast at Ottawa bank could be taste of G8, G20 troubles
Dear Stephen,
Sorry for the lack of writing recently. The weekend was busy, then my folks arrived as work was ramping up. And of course the Habs stunning losses to the Flyers has thrown the universe itself out of wack. So just to bring you up to speed: Greg and Rebecca came over for supper Friday night and unexpectedly it was Claudine who wanted to drink and drink and drink. We polished off the nice Bison grass vodka James’ had given us as a gift, a couple bottles of wine, including a partial of my Dad’s vintage which was not really drinkable, and beer, and then the tequila. It was a late night, and I was tired from work but the post-party, drunken sex was great, and the morning sex not half bad either. Then Saturday we had brunch at the Pickup, and made our way to Oboro by bus to see a performance by Mary Wong, which was great: she was in the studio, singing Chinese opera songs her famous musician-father had taught her only recently, as she is not a singer. He accompanied her on a Chinese violin but the trick was, he was live in Vancouver, at Centre A, so there was this simultaneous Skype thing going on. It was fun to be there but we were a bit wet from the rain, having left the house without umbrellas or rain gear of any kind, including the plastic for Rose’s stroller. We tried to keep her dry with a plastic bag and a newspaper. What ghetto parents we are! Sunday we mostly cleaned up the house a bit, watching a movie in the evening, La teta astutada, a Chilean film that was poetic and dark and kind of mystical, but I was too tired to watch it all and went to bed early. Monday was work, then my parents arrived with Mark and Margo. My folks took the metro from the hotel to our apartment and I made a great big omelet and salad while my dad asked me about baptising Rose. Honestly, Claudine and I have only spoken about it two or three times, and are not decided ourselves, so I wasn’t all that prepared to discuss it with my dad. Still, it was nice to have the conversation. Tuesday I took an extra long lunch to Bixi up and visit with Mark and Margo at their hotel in Westmount, high up on the 18th floor, which is dizzying to me, looking down from the balcony. My folks and Claudine had picked up smoked meat sandwiches from Schwartzes, while Margo sipped a blueberry smoothie. In fact, we all had some as Mark made so much. Margo is more paralyzed than before, having only very minimal use of one had, and she has difficulty speaking and eating. Her appointment was at a controversial clinic to run tests to determine if she could be a considered a candidate for treatment involving the veins in her neck. Apparently the scientific community is divided on the method of study an recently the Quebec government closed the clinic, it will shut its’ doors the end of June. Tuesday night we made chicken on the barbecue and watched the hockey game, but only the first two periods, as by then I had a strong feeling that the game was not theirs, and as well at 9pm Lost was on. It is hard to believe that there is only the season finale left! They are killing off characters left and right. I must admit to being shocked and saddened with the death of Jin and Sun, but at least they were together, but still. Drowning, ugh, not a pretty way to go. Wednesday was a busy day of work, made pasta and salad for supper, my mom looked after Rose a few times today as Claudine had errands to run and some time to herself. My dad left to drive back with Mark and Margo, my parents adored spending some time with Rose. And guess what I did today? I walked to the Revenu Quebec office and gave them post-dated cheques to pay off all my back taxes. They finally contacted DHC to garnish my wages and were going to take $300 per cheque, good grief that is more than my rent. So I made a deal with them, and would have, should have earlier, as I now have to swallow a $500 “recovery fee” that they slapped onto the debt. Good grief they love to make you pay. Pay and pay and pay. It will be a lean year but still working towards freedom 2012.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Thu, May 20, 2010 at 9:59 PM
subject Dépenses électorales: plusieurs ministres conservateurs blâmés; Secretive MP panel open to ideas on watching expenses
Dear Stephen,
After work today, and after buying some sausage from the market, I saw a huge tractor trailer try to turn from our street onto Jean-Talon. The driver completely mis-read the length of his truck as it completely crushed the rear end of a parked car. There were two women inside! Luckily they were not injured, just freaked out. The trucker should never have been on our street, he must have been lost. Speaking of lost, are you planning at all to watch the season finale on Sunday? How on earth are they going to end this? Why has Desmond become such a central character? Why does the fact that Jack has decided to take care of the Island see so anti climatic? And how about the game tonight? I’m listening on radio, had a feeling they would win, and they are on their way. My mom is making entries in Rose’s baby book. I made sausages on the barbecue tonight. Rose was awake when I got home, hungry, she drank more than four ounces. Then she giggled and made all those weird noises she makes, on her vibrating green chair on the kitchen table as we ate. And so now the game is over, a 5-1 victory, and the Habs looked very much to be hungry in this series for the first time, and seem to want to be playing hockey for a long time. But hockey in May or June in Montreal? This hasn’t happened in a while. 17 years, to be exact. Ca sent la coupe ici!
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Thu, May 27, 2010 at 9:41 PM
subject L’opposition réclame la tête du ministre Clement; Obama defends response as BP spill likely exceeds Exxon Valdez
Dear Stephen,
Holy Moly! It has been so long since I last wrote you I can’t even remember when it was. While my mom was still here visiting? While the Habs were still in the playoffs? Before François won the 2009 Prix Emile Neligan? Before my niece Jordyn was born, on Tuesday in fact, at 7lbs 11oz? Yes, Trev and Tamara had their baby, apparently all-natural birth but am waiting for details to emerge. And yes, François won the Prix Emile Neligan the same night the Habs bowed out of the playoffs. It is all for the best, really, I mean, who wants to think about hockey when it is 30+ degrees outside? We’ve had quite the heatwave here recently, only today was somewhat normal. The past few days the heat has been almost insufferable. The apartment gets really hot and stuffy at night. We had a barbecue last night and had Sarah over, as well as Simon and his girlfriend Danielle. She is from Philly but in no way a hockey fan. Simon borrowed the roof racks from our car, which took close to an hour of us fussing with the nuts and bolts, which were rusted, of course. Much hammering ensued, our efforts in no way hampered by the amount of burgers or beer consumed. Claudine is looking into artist residencies for us to consider in lieu of a tourist trip to Berlin in the fall we would like to do something that allows us to focus more on our creative projects. Banff is an option. Perhaps Italy. We have to make some decisions soon but I am so busy at work lately that I am tired and brain-dead at the end of the day. I’m trying to read a book, Independence Day by Richard Ford, which was a book club choice a couple years ago that I never read, but I am averaging maybe one or two pages per night. Gilles and Rose-Marie are coming over tomorrow night, Gilles staying for supper but RM has plans, a dinner or a concert or show or something. My shoulder still hurts but I visited my osteopath the other night for a treatment, wearing clean underwear that fits right, and she mentioned that my muscle pain could be caused by the way I hold Rose. This makes sense as I often have her on my right shoulder, the sore one. I need to balance her better. She is so cute it is often hard to leave for work in the morning as she is often awake and alert and playing her blowing bubbles and making noises games. I want to spend as much time with her as I can. She is sleeping more at night, only waking up once. She goes to bed around 8pm and sleeps until 2:30 or 3, then maybe gets up again close to 7am. OK off to bed.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sun, May 30, 2010 at 12:17 AM
subject Le NPD s’oppose au projet de loi conservateur sur le budget; Canadian commander in Afghanistan fired for alleged relationship
Dear Stephen,
Rose-Marie and Gilles stayed overnight last night. Gilles arrived for supper and we had steaks that I managed to over-cook on the barbecue. Rose-Marie was out at the Miles Davis show and then supper somewhere with friends. This morning they had a quick breakfast with us and then headed off to visit the botanical gardens. Clo, Rose and I had a nice day, first walking to Magali’s big yard sale, where we picked up some clothes and toys for Rose, and considered making an offer on their teak table and chairs. We could maybe get it for $300, but the table needs some work, as do some of the chairs. Could be a nice addition but I am broke, more than usual, as Revenue Quebec now takes $355 from me each month, which is better than the $700 they would have taken if they had garnished my wages. We caught a bus downtown and visited some galleries at the Belgo, the Stéphane Gilot show at Optica was most interesting, a massive model of dystopic/utopic architectural forms, complete with a forest, a drained pool, a section that moved back and forth on train tracks, and little videos in many different rooms of weird performances. In the small gallery were great videos made by German duo Sylvia Winkler and Stephen Koperl, who intervene and comment on the commodification of public space. Speaking of public space, whatever the hell is going on with BP and Top Kill and the US Government and all that oil? I heard tonight that Top Kill (why the weird title? How do you kill oil, or a leak? Why on top?) isn’t working. This must mean that the plan to stuff the leak with oatmeal will begin shortly. And I hear that Canada is still accepting proposals for offshore drilling in the Arctic. Perhaps now would be a good time to re-think the whole off-shore drilling problem. It is bad enough we have the tarred sands. Anyhow, after some gallery visits we went to H&M and bought socks and underwear. I was in bad need for new socks, most of my pairs mismatched or full of holes, and had no short ones at all for my lowcut sneakers. After a brief stop and a feeding for Rose at Nota Bena we took the bus back home, skyped with my brother and Tamara and their new baby Jordyn, then my dad, then we put Rose to bed, ate supper, which Claudine made from leftovers, and watched the Karate Kid, the original from 1984. A corny classic, indeed. Then I watched the third period of the first game of the finals, and even though I think it is too warm outside to think about hockey, it is cool enough at night to watch it on TV.
-chris
from chris lloyd
to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Sun, May 30, 2010 at 9:53 PM
subject Tony Clement évoque la «folle saison» parlementaire; Rumours surround Canadian commander’s dismissal
Dear Stephen.
Lorna suggested to me the other day that I write the same letter to you everyday. I have to admit I am considering it. After all, it is a pointless project from the get-go, in that neither you, Paul nor Jean ever reply personally. I could be writing the same letter everyday it would make no difference. So maybe this is just a lazy way to try to write a book, just keep going, plugging away and hope in the end, whenever that might be, there will be enough of a plot, characters and some sort of story arc to tell a story. Today’s story: awoke to Rose, already awake, giggling at the ceiling. Went for a walk and breakfast at the market. Our espresso-maker is not working. I fixed it this evening, running a vinegar-water mix through it to de-calcify its innards. Came home, washed laundry, went for another walk to check out the multitude of garage sales in the neighbourhood. Bought some books for Rose and some audio cassette tapes for us, for the car, for the long voyages on the horizon. Classics like Dark side of the moon, REMs Out of time, Thriller, the Doors, etc. Checked out flights to Berlin, which is still an option for the fall. Claudine had a WWKA practice, I hung out with Rose, cleaned out the fridge, made a supper from leftovers, fed Rose twice, put her to bed. Hooked up the VCR and recorded an evening of short films made in Québec that was on Télé-Québec. Now some computer work, translating our apartment description for the sublet, and finding an online printer for the birth announcement / thank-you card we are so late in getting out. I think I might respond to a letter I received from Christian Paradis asking for more support for your Conservative Party. He talked about the economic action plan, the creation of jobs, the tough on crime bills, and the fact that you are not re-opening the debate on abortion. Funny, it seems that running counter to the rest of the G8 in terms of women’s health issues in Africa you are doing just that, but whatever, I suppose that is all optics. I will write him back and ask him why the Francofolies was denied Industry Canada funding this year. It seems odd to deny funding to a francophone festival in a city that builds a large portion of its international reputation and attracts tourists because it is exactly that, a festival city. Blah, I just want to go to bed and read, I can’t natter on about politics with you. Oh I pre-ordered the new Arcade Fire album, it comes with 2 free downloads, Month of May and Suburbs. Very 70s-style rock, good stuff. Hard to believe we have been following this band since 2003. Same year I met Claudine. How’s that for a story arc?
-chris
DEAR PM 