2020
from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 1, 2020, 11:59 PM subject One hundred and two
Dear justin,
Happy colonial day. I was reminded of this date just now as the fireworks were going off. Jessica and I are discussing the deer p.m. podcast project, but we are a little too tired to actually begin it. Not sure if we’re actually too tired to have sex but we will find out. We are both a little sore and worn out from last night. You are she is worried that I am making her out to seem like a sex hound, which she is.
Trying to send this before midnight!
Sent with positive vibes from my super-duper hand-held computing device.
from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 2, 2020, 10:58 PM subject One hundred and three
Dear justin,
Spent a full day at VOX and now I am worn out by the end of day, and it was a warm day which made cycling slow. I guess lucky that the AC was working at VOX. I am still wondering whether I should have bought a small AC unit for my apartment, but so far the fans seem to keep the temperature relatively stable. Also, I don’t have any extra money to put towards something like that.
Sent with positive vibes from my super-duper hand-held computing device.
from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 5, 2020, 12:31 PM subject One hundred and four
Dear justin,
Spent all day Friday at Fox, then the night with Jess at her place, then some of Saturday at home on social media getting disgusted by the state of the world, then Saturday night last night with Jess at her place and now we are about to eat and then go look at an open house for a duplex around the corner from her.
What we have been discussing the most this weekend Is Developing the artist residency in New Brunswick for by BIPOC Multidisciplinary artists, but this is also hypothetical at the moment. That, and the deer p.m. podcast, which we figure if we discuss one month of the project per episode then it will take five years to release each episode on a weekly basis, but before getting too far ahead of ourselves we will record and edit a couple episodes and share with friends to get feedback before we start launching. Does that make sense?
I am going to head up to the prison for annoys protest this afternoon. Defund the police and abolish our prisons!
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 6, 2020, 10:38 PM subject One hundred and five
Dear justin,
The protest yesterday was so well attended and phone call and noisy and we accidentally set the grass on fire from some errands fireworks, but the cops just came and put it out with fire extinguishers. Yeah we should call them just firefighters, and that is worthy of funding.
Jess wanted me to tell you that she is still hemorrhaging, she started spotting during sex yesterday and seems to have instigated and midmonths.. She doesn’t seem too concerned.
I grab some painting gear from VOX today and then painted it as ROBERTS, her daughter Gloria‘s room, and was about to install two new AC units except they are massive and require a few extra tools so I will be back tomorrow or later in the week.
I am getting Rose after work tomorrow and I’m excited to see her and spend time just with her; sounds turn on Wednesday. Oh dear oh dear I did I told him about your haemorrhaging still stop stop
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 7, 2020, 11:56 PM subject One hundred and six
Dear justin,
I had a busy day, spent the morning at S Roberts finishing some painting and installing a mammoth AC unit, I still have to put Glorias room back together and install one more unit but will have to do that on the weekend as I am back at Fox for the rest of the week. Spent the afternoon there revising some quotes for a big grant that Marie-Josée and Claudine are working on two heritage Canada. And then I picked Rose up After daycamp and we had a really pleasant evening together, played some video games watched a movie on Netflix about a girl who becomes a cat, went for a long walk and I bought her hair dye that we can use next week or the week after for our state staycation.
Oh, I forgot to tell you I had a phone session with Yaël on Monday, it is good to get some of my feelings, unresolved as they are, about my ex., Out of my mind and into the open. I wonder if I am throwing the baby out with the bathwater? And Am I just projecting that any follow up conversation between us will do you any good? I think I need to keep my boundaries firm.
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 9, 2020, 12:07 AM subject One hundred and seven
Dear justin,
Another day at Fox, picked up so after daycamp and we had a really fun evening together, although he got frustrated at the end of the night because he was having difficulty getting through a level of a new video game. He tries so hard! And he really doesn’t like failure. I hope these qualities serve him well in a few The future.
I had a bunch of things to say about pipelines and the Supreme Court in the US and the disparity of coronavirus victims and Bus I know getting the virus and kind of wishing Trump did as well
I feel in someways just back to the same old days, as Rose said in my birthday card, the same rat raise, chasing contracts and trying to rain in my spending, which is mostly on food and sundries and of course the lion share of my earnings now going to rent, just keeping the head above water so to speak. Now is a really good time Roll out a program of guaranteed national income. It helps artists so much!
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 11, 2020, 11:28 AM subject One hundred and eight
Dear justin,
Spent the night with Jessica at her place, we had AAA over for drinks, which was really nice. We haven’t seen one another since December I think? Or January? She has no fuck…, Shit sorry I was burning a bagel.
Let me get back to you later, I need to go home and do some housekeeping and get my taxes done for chrissake why do I procrastinate so much with them?
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 11, 2020, 9:24 PM subject One hundred and nine
Dear justin,
I forgot to tell you about this weird dream I had a few nights ago about Steve’s a DJ. Most of the dream was about home renovations, parkour and climbing on roofs and holes and floors and weird hallways but at one point Steve’s DJ rang my bell and I saw that it was him and told him I didn’t want him to come in but he came in anyway and I kept retreating through different doors in this apartment until finally I think I was in the final room and I tackled him in the hallway and pinned him down and I remember pinning both his hands behind his back with one hand and hitting him repeatedly on the head with a cast iron frying pan.
I think my therapist will have fun analyzing that next week!
I managed to finish the painting at Matt and Angie‘s condo after the rain stopped and listened to a CANADALAND and then from that heard about a new or new to me podcast called Sandy and Nora talk politics and it is phenomenal and I can’t get enough.
On my way home from painting I saw two cops standing over a drunk guy and it was close to my grocery store where I was stopping anyway so I just stood and watched for about half an hour as the cops waited for this guy to finally take his bike and shamble up the street, at which point one of the cops came towards me a bit and asked if I had called them. Of course I said no, because I hadn’t, and I am not quick witted Enough to come up with a clever retort, such as what do you mean, you don’t know who actually called you?
Anyway, I am off to Jess’s tonight she is finishing a game of DND and we just might start our podcast tonight or at least tested or try it out OK bye.
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 14, 2020, 10:35 PM subject One hundred and ten
Dear justin,
Did I really forget to write you all weekend? And Monday? Sorry about that. Sunday Jessica and I made masks and I painted defund police T-shirts, and I have been at work at VOX yesterday and today. I have Rose tonight, we had sushi for supper, watched a couple episodes of Buffy, went for a walk and checked out that new splash park, and now I am exhausted. I have been spending we bit too much time on a right wing nationalist patriots for Canada Webb Facebook page, it can be infuriating.
I started to listen to a new Canada land about the Wii scandal and whether it might be the end of you as p.m., but I didn’t get a chance to finish so I will do it tomorrow from work.
I have been getting through policing black bodies quite quickly and it is eye-opening and jaw-dropping to learn just how deep the racist foundations of Canada run. Really, you should read it. Although, I don’t know how you could do your job as you have been doing it if you know this stuff.
Why do we always assume that people in power deserve to be there or are somehow smart enough to be there?
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 16, 2020, 10:59 PM subject One hundred and eleven
Dear justin,
It’s always the same all day. Another day at Fox, going around to each video installation tweaking and re-wiring and switching projectors and trying to no avail to get the 55 inch monitor working. Are you recording me? I’m at jesses, she was recording me dictating to you. I listen to the latest episode of Sandy and Nora talk politics, and Canada lands newest one yesterday, both taking a game at the Wii controversy and scandal, although Nora and Sandy really connected it to the natural, corrupt manner of the liberal party. The Wii scandal know we charity, charity, the Wii foundation charity it’s in a lot of trouble right now. Sorry, I am explaining some of this to Jessica and trying to dictate this to you at the same time, just smart enough. That was intended for you, not Jessica. You could even consider doing the honourable thing and step down until the ethics commissioner has a chance to go through all of your recent scandals. Defund the police, Jo!
Dictated, not corrected so
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 18, 2020, 10:11 PM subject One hundred and twelve
Dear justin,
Another heat wave! I got the kids yesterday after camp and we came straight home and then went straight to the pool and managed to get in in the last hour,; they are leading between 75 to 100 people in every hour on the hour. I actually prefer it this way, it is more compact and streamlined and feels less sloppy. In fact, Almost everything about the new changes to how we operate in society seem more thoughtful and less chaotic.
We were at the pool again today, after picking up my bike which has finally been fixed, then going to a waterpark near my bike shop, and waiting an hour and a half in line for the pool but it didn’t really seem that long and the kids don’t mind at all because THEY love the damn pool!
Sara and Pascal came over and we had a distance hang out in the street at a picnic table drinking some beer and reminiscing about poor holiday; she was struck and killed by a car on Wednesday. She was quite the cat, and Sarah and Pascal are quite upset at this loss in their life.
Dictated, not correct it
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 20, 2020, 11:43 PM subject One hundred and fourteen
Dear justin,
Had a good telephone session with gaelle this afternoon, lots to talk about as my ex has been having difficulty dealing with Rose and Saul and their sibling rivalry, or family dynamics as she puts it. It is true that Saul has, On a few occasions, talked about killing himself with a knife, which sounds very dramatic but I believe is his way of avoiding punishment. I certainly don’t think it warrants a trip to the ER and fast tracking him into child psychology.
One thing my therapist said that really stuck with me was that his behaviour should not be pathologist, especially given all of the upheaval of the past year and a half. I am sure that walking into his mothers bed And finding Stephen there instead of me a year and a half ago has probably given him some trauma or at the very least some issues to work through.
Anyway, it was a fun day with the kids, we went to the pool, we went to Dollarama, I came home for lunch, We went to the park, the water park and watched some Buffy for supper and Saul has been playing a lot of this Piku Niku video game.
Also, it looks like I might need to notarize a letter, A custody arrangement letter between my ex and I as a supporting document for our travel into and be to drop the kids off at my parents. I wonder how much that will cost? And can it be done as quickly?
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 22, 2020, 12:02 AM subject One hundred and fifteen
Dear justin,
Another fun filled day with the kids, recycled to NDG to hang out in Westmount Park with S Roberts and Gloria. Then we cycle back up to our neighbourhood and went to the pool for a good long swim, had some slush, came home for a quick supper and some Buffy before my ex picked up the kids for ice cream and a walk.
Rose spent the night or is spending the night with my ex, while Saul elected to stay with me and look for new video games on the edge massive bundle we bought last month; there are over 1000 games to sift through, but there are a number of gems in there, like PQ Nicu game that he just finished today and enjoyed thoroughly..
Sent with positive vibes from my super-duper hand-held computing device.
from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 22, 2020, 12:04 AM subject One hundred and sixteen
Dear justin,
I forgot to tell you about the ongoing entering NB saga, we now need a notarized letter from my ex authorizing the kids travel. Luckily as ROBERTS has a friend who is a notary who gave good advice and might actually be able to stamp the documents, but it is up to my ex to do that. Did I tell you I am borrowing her car parentheses our old car And parentheses, it sounds like it might be in rough shape although she says it should make it I guess.
We were planning to go to the former DHC tomorrow but could not book a reservation until Thursday so we are going to the Mac tomorrow, although Jessica just bailed as she is feeling overwhelmed.
Sent with positive vibes from my super-duper hand-held computing device.
from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 24, 2020, 12:46 AM subject One hundred and seventeen
Dear justin,
I just woke up, Rose too and she came into my room but I walked her back to hers. Actually, I wonder if I should mention to my doctor next week when I talk to her about Saul that I wake up consistently 1 to 3 times per night, is that normal? Last night I felt I couldn’t even get back to sleep for a while, is it from having awesome sex I wonder? Jessica had come over and stayed overnight and we usually sleep fine but even when I stay at her house I wake up a couple times per night. Whatever.
We enjoyed our visit to the Mac yesterday, I think the kids liked Nelson‘s video installation test, we visited Vox afterwards to play ping-pong and watched a couple NFB and music videos, we have been in the pool every day although today I didn’t go.
I am officially a communal to remember, I had to pay the $500 membership fee because my credit rating is still shit. Whatever. I booked a car for tomorrow morning to go get a used AC unit, even though there is no heat wave at the moment it is best to be prepared as I am sure there will be a few more before summer is out.
Dictated, not corrected.
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 24, 2020, 10:21 PM subject One hundred and eighteen
Dear justin,
Boy what a day. Had booked communal total so biked to corner of Saint Laurent and Bernard to get the car and came back to get the kids and then drove down to the McGill ghetto to get the air conditioner unit, which works fine and was pretty much exactly what we needed. Drop the kids in the AC unit off at home, Return to the car, baked back home made lunch went to the pool came home made snacks and we cycled to park La Fontaine to need and had a couple hours of just hanging out in the park and then attempted to cycle home but saw was exhausted and had a brief little meltdown on the bike path at rush-hour. But he pulled it together and we walked down to Mont Royal and had hotdogs and onion rings and french fries at Mont Royal hot dog and then biked home and started watching descendants, and Disney musical the offspring of wicked characters from fairytales? And then went to bed. And we are all exhausted. The kids are asleep and I am about to be asleep to.
Dictated, not corrected
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from chris lloyd to pm@pm.gc.ca
date Jul 25, 2020, 10:56 PM subject One hundred and nineteen
Dear justin,
What a day! We finished the descendants, watched descendants two, went to the pool, came home for lunch, biked down to old Montreal and visited the exhibition at DHC, spoke to Johnson who is still there and always gives such apparel A passionate rundown of the show, he also gave Saul an ice pack for his shoulder as guess who was doored on the way down? Yes! Poor Saul was hit by his first car door, knocked him right onto the pavement and bruised a finger and a bruise on his collarbone but luckily nothing to say Too severe. I was so angry when it happened but it was just a careless accident and I can’t stay angry at people for some thing so unintentional. Anyway, then we went on the big wheel and that led to Rose really wanting to do the zip line and since there are so few people In the old port they were selling a zip line ride for 15 bucks and two kids as young as three so all three of us went! Rose loved it, so did Saul, so did I for that matter. After all, this is staycation. After the zip line we even did the SOS labyrinth, which was also a lot of fun. After that we ate at in A and W, and then began what I knew would be a difficult bike ride home as the kids were exhausted. But what a fun day! Rose said she would never forget it. No bedtime stories tonight, although for some reason they asked me just to tell stories from my life and after telling them about my bike accidents somehow got to speaking about Some of the stories from when my ex and I first met, and we are so madly in love. It’s still brings up bittersweet memories for me, as you know.
Dictated, not corrected
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DEAR PM 